I feel it now,
that cold October ache
that comes only
with the change of seasons
and the absence of you.
I sense your presence
dripping from me slowly,
more and more as
each day passes
and the miles between us
make little effort
to shrink.

Without your company,
it is a chore to smile
and impossible to laugh.
Without your warmth,
it is not enough
to dress in layers
and crank the heat until
my parents yell at my foolishness
and turn it back down.

Since you have been gone,
art has lost its soul
and music has had no bass line.
My toast is dry now that
you are not here.
Nothing is the same
and I forget how it used to be.

I had a dream
that you came home.
We watched TV and argued
like always
and I smiled and laughed again.
Funny how you can do in dreams
what you’ve forgotten how to do
in real life.

I miss you, and I mean that.
I miss the glow that
surrounds you and always would
rub off, just a little,
on me. Without you
part of me is gone
and that cold October ache
fills me like a sickness.