"A Cry for Help"

December 30, 2007
"A Cry for Help"
I feel so alone
locked up in my room
I wish I could come out
but dinner is soon

Here my parents come now
to ask why I'm not eating
I burry my head in my pillow
to act like I’m sleeping

They "wake me up"
And I say I'm not hungry
"You haven’t eaten all day
are you sick or something?"

I am screaming now
saying I'm fine
they think I'm insane
but it's my hidden cry

It’s a cry for help
a cry for peace
a cry unheard
but it heard, could save me

I stay in my room
there are tears in my eyes
for I hate what I'm doing
and I hate all the lies

I look in the mirror
and finally, I look thin
so I go downstairs
apologize, and eat with them

After dinner is through
I go up to my room
Look in the mirror again
and, oh my God! I grew!

How could I do this?
why did I give in?
I was so stupid
and now I'm no longer thin

I run to the bathroom
and turn on the shower
that will cover the noise
of me puking, for the next hour

I reach my hand down my throat
again, again, and again
But everything won’t come up
When will I ever be finished?

One last dry heave
and I collapse on the floor
"Come on, come up
I know I ate more!"

I look down into the toilet
with tears cascading down my face
I feel trapped with the choices
that only I made.

As I come back to reality
I smile, and think to myself
"There is a way out
I can escape this hell,
with help."
-Jessie Michelle Haskamp

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