Love Is Pain

July 1, 2011
By Uga10 SILVER, Verbena, Alabama
Uga10 SILVER, Verbena, Alabama
5 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Money grows on the tree of persistance!


Love is pain,
some times it is a gain
some people have it in there life
some people feel it toward their wife
I think love is a crazy thing
especially when it means everything
Some day I will truly love
I will love like a dove
a beautiful dove on a pretty day
the dove will not always be this way
many things change in a life time
this is just like mine


The author's comments:
A relationship inspired me to write this

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This article has 10 comments.


on Dec. 14 2011 at 5:31 pm
Evilgummysattack GOLD, Williamsburg, Michigan
16 articles 0 photos 10 comments
It was decent, you are definatly talented.  Reach deeper though.  I cry sould be undoubtably a cry and a prayer sould be undoubtably a prayer in poetry.

on Nov. 23 2011 at 10:55 am
savetheplanet PLATINUM, Anaheim, California
45 articles 9 photos 565 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

The poem is sweet but you need to go deeper, it's too much on the surface.  Also, the meter could use some work.  But for your first try it's actually quite good. :D

on Nov. 23 2011 at 4:55 am
Dillon27 BRONZE, Jonesville, Louisiana
1 article 0 photos 2 comments
i like it. (:

Uga10 SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 12:48 am
Uga10 SILVER, Verbena, Alabama
5 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Money grows on the tree of persistance!

thanks and will do :)

Alurayne GOLD said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 12:46 am
Alurayne GOLD, Mesa, Arizona
14 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A Revolutionary ends when he becomes an oppressor or a heretic."
-Albert Camus

To really make something stand out, you have to dodge the cliches! I agree, the dove line sounded a bit forced, I think, because it's cliched. But the intent of the poem is good :) Don't be afraid to go outside of the love ideas people are used to!

Uga10 SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 12:43 am
Uga10 SILVER, Verbena, Alabama
5 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Money grows on the tree of persistance!

thanks 

on Nov. 23 2011 at 12:41 am
RaveFire PLATINUM, Vancouver, Washington
32 articles 1 photo 218 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Sometimes You Have To Give Up Your Life To Save It." ~some book that i don't remember the name of

"Live Life Like There's No Yesterday" ~ random billboard

"If No One Can Hurt You, Then Nobody Loves You" ` ~ Kerli?

not bad. the metaphor changes constantly but overall its not bad

Sail_ BRONZE said...
on Nov. 15 2011 at 1:10 pm
Sail_ BRONZE, Eugene, Oregon
3 articles 10 photos 196 comments
i thought it was good, although the line about the dove seemed rather forced. but toher than that, it was sweet!

on Nov. 14 2011 at 5:12 pm
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1985 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

Hey, that was really good!!! I think though the last line shouldve o r couldve said 'this is just a life like mine.' like, with repitition of the word 'life'. but anyway, it's still cool :)

sakina GOLD said...
on Jul. 17 2011 at 1:42 am
sakina GOLD, Chennai, Other
18 articles 13 photos 173 comments

Favorite Quote:
A negative thinker See's a difficulty in every opportunity but a positive thinker sees an opportunity in every difficulty. So always think positive and u'll surely B successful in LIFE.
-Hazrat Ali (A.S)

Superb...Bravo Bravo...:)The poem is AWESOME..!!!!


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