My Head Down and Eyes Closed

May 28, 2008
Couldn't you see my eyes full of tears, when my soul was telling you "stop?"
You rained down on me like a waterfall with words, yelling and repeating names.
I stood quietly with my head down and eyes closed, crying inside silently.
I needed a break, I Wanted a break.
Why could she not understand me?
I stood almost numb while hearing the words come towards me like falling glass.
I heard the door close behind me.
I looked up and my soul cried out.
Let me be, I am not you and I will Never be You.
I twirled rigorously over and over again, and I looked up once to see the world around me.
My life was blurry and unrecognizable.
I fell to the ground with my head thumping.
I let go of my pain, and cried.
I laid on the ground with my head down and eyes closed.
Laid there until I heard perfect silence.
Silence had come to me to comfort me.
I looked up to the ceiling and saw stars, I grinned and got up.
It wasn't silence who came to me, it was you.
I got up, cleared my tears and walked over to my escape.
I sat down and played a mellow tune.
While I crooned along and found myself too. I saw the reflection of a girl smiling and listening peacefully.
I looked back at her and said, "Don't be like me when you grow up."
And she responded, " I am you, I'm the girl inside waiting to reflect the inside on the outside."
I looked at her and wondered, how come I could not reveal what I so longed for.
She spoke to me and said, "Once you truly want me to come out, I will come out."
The reflection faded away, and I was left alone.
I played my favorite tune a key at a time, and listened to the music flow through me.
I closed my eyes, breathed in, and let her smile fill me.
For her smile was my own, but it was long forgotten by something called

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