To My Dad

For what you did and
what you said
now I hate you
It’s something that I can’t help
I know I’m not supposed to
but it is a feeling that lives inside
You want to see me as though
nothing happened
I can’t act as though
it doesn’t hurt
because it does
For all the nights
I cried myself to sleep
while I was trying to make
the nightmares
disappear
but every time
I closed my eyes
I saw your face and
the nightmares appeared again
You are my dad
I should not say these things
but when I think of you
I remember again
Maybe one day
I’ll forgive you
maybe I won’t
I still don’t want to see you
because when I do
it brings back
the hurt.