The Endless Search

I dream
Of love
But never seem
To find it

See a couple
See a kiss
See a hug
See a gift

All these
Stabs my heart
Tears fall
When alone

What is wrong with me?

Unique
Beauty
Sweet
Intellect

I have all of these traits
But why does love
Not come my way?

Here comes
Another couple
Same passion
Same glint of joy

But, here
My eyes are dark
My heart is a lake
My knees begin to buckle

I run to the bathroom
My hands on the sink
My face downcast
Tears fall

Light falls
Across my face
I love God
But why does He let me cry?

So many years
So many years
Of being alone
And being the only single girl
In my group

So many people
Believe and tell
That I am a very amazing girl
But I don’t have faith in this

I have had faith
For many years
Many years
But my patience is thin now

My heart boils
The tears
To fury
My hands clench in fists

I want to scream
I want to lash out
Especially at the light
But I know not to do so

I take a deep breath
The boiling ceases
Back to the lake
With my body weak

These emotional states
I always hide
In public
Behind a confident smile

I have tried many things
I have learned many advice and tips
But nothing seems to help
A tear falls for these reasons

The light soothes my face
I know He is there
And I stare
Frozen in my sadness

What is wrong with me?
Am I unlovable?
Why does He let me cry?
Please, show me the way

Then my superficial layers come back
To hide the negative emotions
As I need to get back to class

I wash my face
I gain my fake smile back
But my eyes tell a different story

My eyes tell
Of a strong, unique girl
Who dreams of love
But never seems to find it





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