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Your eyes are fierce.
They're ivy green with golden specks.
Your hair is a chestnut brown.
You look as if you should be in a military uniform,
With your buzzed head and strong, bulky build.
You're huge, towering over me,
My face lands in your powerful chest.
You're slanted snake eyes stare
Into my frightened eyes.
I know you are a monster,
A demon straight from hell.
You're close- too close.
Cigarettes and lemons wafting off you.
You're completely sober.
Why are you so damn close?
I try to shuffle around you,
And you don't let me pass.
You continue to stare at me.
The first word out of your nasty mouth.
I try to rebuttal-
But, you're strong, masculine hand stops my words.
My mind doesn't comprehend.
"I've been watching you," you say.
You slam me into the tan, cold wall.
Your hand silences me.
I'm flung into a room.
You lock the door.
I'm stuck in your arms.
You think I'm your slave.
You're taking my innocence.
I'm fighting back.
Nothing is working.
I kick your body,
But, my kicks have no effects on your muscles.
You have me pinned to a bed.
I scream into your sweaty, evil hand.
There is no hair to pull on head.
I'm trying to push you off.
Your taking off my clothes.
It is all going to fast.
I don't even know your name.
You don't know mine.
I've never seen this beast before.
I'm hitting, pushing, kicking.
Whatever I can do to get you away.
As you do what I fear,
Pull down your pants,
I know my "stops!"
and cursing mean nothing.
You're touching and trying.
I'm hurting and pleading.
And then, for one second,
You are the weak one, you bastard.
For one second, your grip isn't tight enough, you scum.
For one second, I have an escape from this fiend.
I take it, I fight back.
I am not weak.
I am not a coward.
I am not slow.
I am not your f***ing piece of meat.
I poke you in your evil eyes with my nails.
I hope they bleed, I'll be gone before I can know.
I kick you in your manhood.
Your cry of pain lets me know it hurts.
I get out from under your disgusting body.
I break away from the monster.
I swing a punch into your face.
I quickly gather my belongings that I can find.
I run, I leave, I'm gone.
After that night, I never saw you again.
I never knew who you were.
You violated me,
But, I got away before you took all of me.
I never told anyone about a part of me that was left that room.
I didn't speak of it for 2 years.
You haunted me in my dreams.
You made me feel unsafe.
You made me see the beautiful world as an ugly vile place.
I got away, but, I am sure others did not.
I hate you.
You stole the last part of the little bit of happiness I had left.
You made me hate myself more than I already did.
You made me believe it was my fault somehow.
You are a bastard.
You are nothing.
I hope you spend eternity in hell,
Where your lowlife self belongs.
But, oddly, I would also like to thank you.
You broke an addiction.
Which led to the loss of friends,
Almost as equally evil as you.
You led to many things.
But, I rose above them all,
Finding my true strength as a person.
In some ways, you may have been a blessing in disguise.