One upon a time their was a girl. She doesn't think she's particularly smart. Or pretty. Or talented. Or kind. She's avarage in every possible way. If this was real life this girl would go to a fairly good college, get a fairly good job, and live fairly happily after. But it's not. This is the universe where vampires don't suck blood, or do anything vaguely interesting. Bella Swan is the above girl, who would live a fairly boring fairy tale if this was real life. But who wants to read about Bella becoming a soccer mum who tweets about nothing? Not this generation. Your avarage girl picks up this book. Bella doesn't need to have a soul, she doesn't need to have any dreams, or ideas, or things she loves above all else. Because Bella has about as much personality as a cardboard box (no offense cardboard boxes of the world.)Bella gets swept off her feet by Edward, who apparently has enough soul for both of them. To me, reading about Edward Cullen is the literary equivalent of sitting down and eating a bag of sugar straight. So sweet it's disgusting, trust me I know how it feels to eat a bag of sugar. So Edward sweeps Bella right of her feet and Bella loses all remnants of being a real person. With Edward she's whole. I think this relation is bound to fail, their seventeen right? There going to break up after three months and have an angry facebook fight, then settle on just being friends. Of course not, cuz it's twooo luv11111! Bella continues to tell us how amazing Edward is. He sounds like her father. Bella's not allowed to do this, or that or have any fun at all. Poor Bella. She should dump Edward and buy a nice cat. But she won't because she luffs her Eddie fureva!!!1 I have something to tell all of you who say you can relate to Bella, there are no Edwards to save you, Prince Charming is a lie. Nobody's going to save you, and even if you had an Edward, you'd get over it and not want to be saved from every little danger. Be the hero of your own story, damsels in distress never have any fun.
The Twilight Phenomon and why it reminds me of eating straightsugar. by Blueberry Poptart
March 26, 2010