the "right" way to parent, or wrong?

September 22, 2009
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September 21, 2009

Teen Ink
P.O. Box 30
Newton, MA 02461

Dear Editor:

Everyone wants to know the key to having "the perfect child". Honestly, they don't exist. Although in reaching this common goal their are different methods of parenting, including authoritative parenting. Many parents believe that this is the best way to go. Now its time for a teen's opinion, authoritative parenting is just the easy way to "control" your kids, not the best or most effective way.

Teens feel trapped when their parents are always in their lives, telling them how to dress, think and behave. Teenagers can think for themselves and if parents don't allow them to make mistake while they are young, they may never learn, or they will when its too late. According to Dr. Dorothy Briggs a noted author and parenting expert commented that authoritarian parenting "teaches children to not trust their own opinions and abilities to make decisions" children will think that they need others to always help them and will be dominated by other peers. They wont stand up for what they believe in.

Teens may get higher grades in high school and may study longer, because they fear the consequences that they are faced with from their parents, but later in life they may rebel. After being controlled all their lives, teens have to rebel. They may behave while parents have control, but parents wont have control forever. So as soon as that occurs the young adult may act out and make mistakes that they should have made and learned from as a teen. Its like caging an animal, as soon as you let it out it will run.

Also, people that are brought up in this lifestyle will most likely repeat that parenting fashion with their own kids or stray so far from it that their children are out of control. You don't want your kids to resent you, and teens don't want to resent their parents. Its best to just keep an open mind with your children. Allow them to make their own mistakes and live their own lives. Parents wont be around forever so kids need to learn to live without them.


Jena D.

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