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Cirque Du someday

Chapters:   « Previous 1 ... 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 13 Next »

life, and love

I raced down the stairs headed straight for my mother’s room, I slammed the door open causing it to make a loud bang when it hit the wall. “I was right, I did see you! Mom what is he doing here?”. “Honey me and your father”, “he is not my father, a father does not abandon a child, his wife, in their time of need.” “We have been talking, Trust me honey. We have talked it over a lot, and we are getting back together. Your father found a few performers who are willing to come move out here. And we both have decided on a facility to use for training. “Are you serious? You just expect me to do whatever you say, without even asking me”. I ran upstairs back into my room, and buried my face into my cold pillow, Of course I want to perform again, but I don’t understand. We were perfectly fine without him here and we could have preformed again. But why did he leave us and randomly decide to make his way out across the country and bombard his way back into our lives. I feel into a deep sleep and had a terrible night terror. I came to school dressed as a clown and everyone was laughing and making fun of me. I’m so worried I’ll get judged by my friends but what would they really think if they knew the real me? I lifted my head from my tear drenched pillow, all I wanted to do is run away. I didn’t have anyone to talk to felt so alone. I knew for a fact that I didn’t want to face this alone. I grabbed my coat and went down the stairs Aunt Rhonda, Uncle, dad and mom were all sitting around the coffee table laughing like nothing that happened. It hurt how neglected I felt at that moment, my mom yelled “Hey Zoe come join us”. I didn’t stop; I headed right for the door. I needed to get out of that house and get some fresh air.
Walking along the road every time a car drove past me a gust of wind hit me and felt like it went right through my body. It seemed like I had been walking forever. The sun was still high up in the sky as if it were a summer day. A head of me I saw a park that was right on the ocean. 5 minutes later I was sitting on a bench looking at the soothing waves. Hundreds of feet in the air above where the side of the mountain meets the solid ground covered in white sand.
I wonder what would happen if I jumped, well obviously I know what would happen, but what would people think? How would people react, I’ve only been here for a few weeks, it’s not like I’ve had the kind of connection with people that they would mourn for years about it. I’ve never even be able to live on the edge. Inside me, I do want to jump. But I don’t want to. I wonder if just walking to the edge would be enough, just feeling that life of death situation.
I walked just close enough that my big toe was touching the edge, and then I sat down. Something inside me felt at peace, like I knew that I was in the right mind and I’m not that crazy that I would actually do something like that. Like imagine how crazy people would think I was if they saw me right now. Just as that thought it, a siren went off. Someone on a projector was talking “Miss please step away from the edge, you’re in good hands just don’t jump.” I let out a laugh “Ahahha No sir, I’m not going to jump it’s okay, I was just sitting down to get a closer look at the bottom you don’t need to worry.” I got up and a lady let out a scream, I lost my balance. I was falling backwards. I’m going to die, I’m so stupid how I could do this to myself, my family, and my friends. I closed my eyes.
I opened my eyes and it was blurry. Oh my goodness, I’m dead. My vision cleared up and I saw the same police officer and a boy with black spiked hair wearing a wet suit. Tears filled my eyes, I knew that I was safe but I was so overwhelmed. My whole body was numb from shock, I didn’t understand. I took a big gasp of air and all my senses came back to life. “Are you okay, do you feel any pain, can you tell me your name?” I tried so hard to talk but I couldn’t. I was so overwhelmed. More sirens came and before I knew it I was strapped into a stretcher and in an ambulance. Next to me was the boy who I assume saved my life? I wanted to talk to him but I was still in shock.
Thank God. I’m still alive.
I closed my eyes and fell asleep. I woke up finding myself in a hospital room hooked up to IV, My throat was dry, I looked around to see a nurse and to my astonishment I saw the same boy who was in the ambulance with me sitting in the chair next to my bed. “Do you need some water?” I shook my head, he left out the room and I examined my body looking for cuts bruises or missing limbs. I was intact; I cleared my throat right on time for the boy to walk in with a glass full of water. I grabbed it from his hand, took a sip that turned into the glass ending up empty. “Thank you so much, OH THANK GOD IM NOT A MUTE” and threw my hands in the air, “OR A CRIPPLE!!” “The tan boy with black spiked hair let out a chuckle. “How are you feeling?” “I feel great, what happened?” “funny thing is I saw the whole thing, everyone was convinced you where suicidal but I saw you sitting with your feet hanging over the edge and then a lady screamed and I guess it startled you and you lost your balance, I was only a few feet next to you and grabbed your wrist, and you hit your head and passed out!”, “Oh my gosh, I cannot believe how stupid I can be. But thank you so much, you literally saved my life. What’s your name?”. “it’s no problem, I always wanted to be able to say that I’ve saves someone’s life. And my name is Zac”. “Well there you go, I always wanted to fall off the side of a mountain and almost die” he looked at me strangely, “kidding! But Zac I owe you big time, really thank you!”
I looked deep into his eyes, and there was a moment of silence. I could feel my heart pounding, and I really had no idea. The moment was put on hold as my Mom and Dad rushed into the hospital room, Mom looking like she was on a mission. “Oh honey, are you okay, what in the world happened?” she said in a consoling tone. “I’m fine mom, I don’t really want to talk about it but may I put someone on the spot, this is Zac. He saved my life and I would literally be dead if he wasn’t there I would be dead.”, “thank you so much kid” My dad said with a slight grin on his face, “Well me and your father are going to check you out of the hospital and we are on our way, them exiting the hospital room leaving Zac and I alone again. “Hey Zoe, there is a bonfire going on a few blocks away. Do you want to come?”, “Yeah that would be fun!”


My parents checked me out of the hospital room, “Hey mom, I’m going to go hang out with Zac, and I’ll be home later on.” Then off Zac and I went. The sun was still up in the sky, but instead of light blue the sky was a soft pink. The sun was getting ready to set. We reached the beach that Zac was taking me to and there were around 12 kids sitting on logs around a bonfire. I felt kind of awkward with all the people who I had no idea about, “I’ll be right back, I got to go grab my guitar out of my car. Just sit back, and get to know everyone!” I was sure sitting there, looking down at my nails. All the girls there were all friends. “Hi!” a girl with bright pink hair greeted me, “How are you?” “I’m good, you know. Just chilling, how are you”. “I’m good, you must be the girl who came with Zac am I right?”, “Yeah how did you know?” “He texted me telling me you were coming, you know this is a big surprise, Zac doesn’t normally hang around with girls! You must be mighty special”, “Oh uh, yeah sure?” Zac ran back with a leather guitar case and plopped down on the log beside me and flashing his adorable smile. I turned away and pretended to look at the water so he couldn’t see my cheeks turn red. “So what exactly is this, do you guys just get together every weekend?” “Yeah well we all like to just hang out and live life to the fullest you know?”

We were all sitting on the log and then I felt Zac scoot closer to me, His warm body heat radiating onto me. We had been eating smores and my hands were all sticky, Hey guys, I’m going to go wash my hands in the water, please don’t do anything exciting without me”, they all let out a chuckle, “I’ll join you!” Zac said, I was getting nervous I could feel my heart beating fast, not knowing what to expect. It was dark out, I couldn’t really see anything except for the lit up fires along the beach. I made it to the water’s edge and placed my sticky hands into the cold water. “so how are you enjoying tonight?, “it’s really fun, these are a great group of people.”, “Yeah they are really extraordinary, I’ve known them all since grade 5, and we have just been growing up together since then. Most of us don’t go to the same schools, so we made a deal to all meet here and hang out every weekend!”, “That’s really great. I wish I had that kind of friendship with people here!”, “well what elementary school did you go to, I wouldn’t be surprised if I knew someone you did growing up in this area, “Oh well I actually just moved here from Rhode island a few weeks ago!”, “Oh I see!” we were now sitting on the soggy sand, I didn’t care if my pants where getting wet, I was sitting beside this gorgeous man and there was barley inches away from us. He put his arm around me and started stroking my leg with the other. “Why do girls shave their legs? It’s so strange, don’t your legs get cold from lack of hair?” He laughed, “Well we do so boys like you can keep us warm” I nuzzled my Head into the side of his shoulder and wrapping my arms around his waist. It was silent but it wasn’t awkward or anything, it was probably the most enjoyable moment I have had the whole time I was there. I really had never been so forward with any boy in my entire life, but there was something about the moment that made it feel so easy going, I kissed the side of his neck. He turned his face towards mine, he didn’t kiss me. But looked into my eyes and said, “I knew that there was a reason for saving you. Seconds after his warm lips were pressed against mine.

I pulled away, I didn’t want things getting too carried away, considering the fact that I only met this guy hours before. “Whoa, that was sudden.”, “Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to come onto you like that”. “No, no it’s okay. I’m really happy that you did, but I think that I should actually get to know you.” I let out a chuckle. “Yeah I would like that, tomorrow would you like to go out for some snow cones?”, “For sure! But... what are snow cones?” he had a straight look on his face, “you don’t know what snow cones are?” I felt as if I had been missing out on the world from his facial reaction, “no...”, “well you indeed are going to taste the best thing in the world tomorrow, now it I don’t know what kind of people your parents are, but I am guessing your curfew is a little bit before 2am. I’ll drive you home.” We walked back avoiding the Zac’s group of friends hand in hand. We finally made it to an old beat up blue jeep with no roof or doors, “this is kind of sketchy”, “eh don’t worry, no more than 3 people have died in this thing” he laughed and flashed his heart melting smile. He started up the engine and started driving; he placed his hand on top of mine enter laced his fingers around mine and stroked my hand is thumb. I told him all the wrong directions so that the drive home could somehow last forever. After circling the whole city we finally made it to Aunt Rhonda’s house. “I’ll see you later Zo!” I panicked, I didn’t know if I should kiss him or not, so I got out of the car and waved my hand back at him. Why did you do that, seriously Zoe? You have this hunk of hotness in the car who wants to kiss you. I heard the engine of his car start again. Well I guess I lost that chance and wonderfulness... Then startling me he grabbed my shoulders and turning me around saying “where do you think you’re going?” and placed his hands on the head and kissed me like no guy had ever before. “I’ll see you tomorrow” as he walked away, I felt weak in the knees. My brain was thinking a thousand things at the same time, and my heart was beating a thousand beats per a minute I walked inside and walked up to my room. Everyone was sleeping, I sunk into my bed, and all I could do is smile. I didn’t bother putting my Pyjamas on or brushing me teeth, I just snuggled into my bed and hoped for tomorrow to come faster.
What a movie moment, I never would have thought that something like that would happen to me. I used to watch those sappy romantic movies that made everyone feel so alone hoping that every guy that sweeps a girl of her feet will be the guy for them forever. Not claiming that Zac will be. But I never would have imagined that something so romantic could happen to the circus freak, what am I going to tell Viola? Am I. Oh no... What am I going to tell Cody?
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