I Dreamt About Boston
By Andrea Philippa Z., Sofia, Bulgaria
Author's note: I am very concerned about the widespread violence that seems to be shaping our world.I guess that... Show full author's note »
10And the day of my interview was here. I got up early, dressed up fast and was ready an hour before I was supposed to leave. So I was just standing in front of the mirror, remembering the things I ought to say to the interviewer, trying not to forget anything, while Jay was laughing at me and encouraging me at the same time. I was getting more and more nervous but I guess that was partly because of the two (or maybe three) coffees I drank quite quickly. I finally left the house, in a hurry, as Jay shouted “good luck” at me. How ironic, I was ready when it was too early to leave and when I actually left, I was already in a hurry. Of course, I took my best friend with me, too. My iPod. I was hoping the music will calm me, make me think about something else, take my mind off all those things.
As I put the headphones in my ears, I realize it has no battery left at all. Again, me and my luck. It is such a great friend of mine, so helpful and supportive every time. Note the sarcasm. I deserve an award for my horrible luck.
Sad that I’ll continue walking without music, I try to think about something else, that is hopefully positive. I look as the sun was going down. Honestly, it was one the most beautiful sunsets I had ever seen in my life. In this particular moment, I feel truly happy without really knowing why. Probably just because of what I saw. The clouds were almost blue but the whole sky was orange. The sun was almost gone, yet you could still see it staring at you as if it said: “I am still watching every move you make.” This glowing ball of fire blinded us all with its power and effectiveness.
I stop in a moment, in attempt to look closely at the sunset and really enjoy it, but deep inside I guess I knew I just had to stop, take a step back, take one last breath that wasn’t going to hurt. Because something was going to happen. I knew that. Something that would change everything, in all possible ways. Something that would completely turn my life over and make me doubt in everything, no matter if it’s reality or imagination, no matter if it’s my actions or someone else’s, no matter I saw something that was in front of me, I’d doubt in its existence. I’d doubt in everything I do. And that would continue forever. Like an endless movie or tape, an action which you could never stop. Something that goes on and on and each time it repeats, things get worse, it gets more painful. I’d doubt in the truth.
So I tried to enjoy this final second of peace that lasted so long, it sort of filled the air with its continuation.
‘Let’s enjoy the silence… Before it gets too loud. So loud, you can’t even hear your own thoughts.’ I think to myself.
‘So, Tate…’ I hear a woman’s voice begin. When she calls my name, I turn around with curiosity, to see who it is, even though I know I’ll regret it. I’ll regret the fact that I didn’t run away immediately. Run so far away, the finding of me would be impossible. Run away with an amazing speed, flying through the streets, just like in my weird oracular dream that happened so long ago. At least that’s how it all felt to me.
I turned around to see who was calling me and the moment I did that, I felt the horror taking over my body, filling it slowly, until there’s no space left. In that moment, it even felt like… Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing makes sense (it never did, didn’t it?). Time stopped and my face went white as I looked at the old lady. I felt like there are a million ants on my body, eating every inch of it, especially my brain, my sense of control, consciousness and sober, logical way of thinking. The word “shock” isn’t even enough. I even felt like my eyes were going to pop out. Or like I’m drowning though there’s no water. I can’t breathe though the oxygen fills the air. My whole body was going to be torn in a million pieces, each one finding itself at a different place on the Earth. It was as if two people were holding my arms and were pulling me in opposite directions. It was that painful. It was all horror.
And simultaneously, when I saw Dawn, standing in front of me, I wasn’t surprised. She was so close, so real, I could even feel her breathing. Her face was somehow so clear to me, so familiar, as if she was here, next to me, by my side through the whole time, during everything I did for the past several weeks. It was like I knew her all my life, like she was a huge part of it, of my existence, yet so not noticeable. All the memories came back to me in a blink of an eye. Dawn takes a deep breath and I know she’ll say something. One sentence that would change everything. She’s smiling creepily. Her hair is still messed up and her eyes are shining in a frightening way. Her huge brown eyes I had memorized so long ago. Her voice is so calm when she speaks to me:
‘I bet you miss your good old silver Volvo.’