The story of a girl whose inner struggles vanishes when she learned to love herself.
It all began at the beginning of her sophomore year of high school.
All of her life she was bullied. Called names, insulted about her mental capacity; even her body physique. She felt like nothing she could ever do would make her societies image of beautiful. People made her hate herself more than they hated her.
Anorexic; Jolly Green Giant; Giraffe Girl; Bigfoot; Scatch-squatch; the names always hurt more than sticks and stones.
Stupid; Illiterate; Slow; Stu-utter Snail; Lispy- Leigh; Those shots thrown at her mental capacity made her only want to become incompetent of thinking smarter.
You know the old saying "sticks and stones may break your bones but names will never hurt me." That saying is the worst thing you could tell someone. Words leave a permanent scar unlike the broken bones. Broken bones can heal themselves; Broken souls cannot heal themselves.
As time went on she stopped seeing the beauty; as time went on she started seeing the ugly.
Thus, began the long journey of self-hate and tunneled vision of societies idea of beauty.
Societies vision of beauty: slim thick but not overweight; skinny but not underweight; 5'6 or under pull her closer; 5'6 or above push her further; no makeup is a breakup; covered in makeup is caked up.
Society only cares about outer beauty. She believed your beauty comes from within; outer beauty is just an extra bonus. This girl saw people from inside to out as if she saw their souls before their skin. She didn’t see people for their appearance; she saw people for their spirit.
She only wanted perfection and beauty. Perfectionism caused her to second-guess everything Beauty caused her to destroy her self-worth. They both caused her more harm than the names. Correction, it was more than a want; that "want" was actually a need.
She would beat herself up mentally and physically for perfection. Hours a night just to make sure she achieved all A's in school. Staying up all night only made her look like a complete fool. She wore tons of makeup to hide her freckles. She didn’t want to be titled "Polka-Dot Girl" any longer.
That created shyness and anxiety. A ruthless fear of talking in front of peers; hands would tremble when speaking publicly. Fear of needing perfect grades; caused mounds of test anxiety. All of her problems created bad behavior; her bad behavior was just an outcry for help.
She gave up on everything; giving up made a giant tornado. She dropped her friends like pennies that had fallen out of her wallet. Her grades began to drop like drops of water hitting the earth's surface. The curls in her hair became an untamable lion's mane. Her wardrobe that was once t-shirts and jeans developed into sweatpants and hoodies.
One day when she was feeling as she could go no more she saw this amazing quote. This drugged her out of the dark place.
Enough to take the actions
Required for your happiness...
Enough to cut yourself loose
From the drama-filled past...
Enough to see a high standard
Enough to feed your mind And body in a healthy manner...
Enough to forgive yourself...
Enough to move on"
That quote helped her realize something. She realized that she'd eventually be ok again. She decided she needed help for her problems. She finally admitted to herself she had a problem she couldn’t fix on her own. That’s when she got counseling; counseling helped her regain her self-worth. She had finally started to feel human again.
Societies version of beauty is completely repulsive. Teaching girls from such a young age that beauty is everything; Teaching girls from such a young age that beauty is key. Societies standards are the reasons girls look like Barbie Dolls; Societies standards are the reasons girls look like Bratz Dolls. Society should be ashamed of themselves for making young girls believe they have no self-worth if they don’t fit into societies idea of beauty.
Day by day she regained her self-confidence. She learned she doesn’t need pounds of makeup to feel beautiful. That she doesn’t need tight clothes to feel sexy. Nor to have her hair flat-ironed every day to feel gorgeous.
With her now found self-love she started to embrace her natural looks. To embrace her curls; to let her lion mane loose. To embrace her body; to not cover every inch possible. To embrace her glasses; not to feel as if she's a nerd.
She now feels good enough in her own body. She is beyond happy. She feels free from all the dark clouds that once followed her every move.
This story is about a girl who learned the true meaning of self-worth.
She now believes self- worth comes from within; she now believes self-worth is in the eye of the beholder. She sees herself as beautiful; she doesn’t believe people's judgement. She is comfortable in her own skin; she doesn’t feel the urge to fit in.
This is the story of a girl who believes that everyone is beautiful, for their personality; not for their looks.