You know, it’s not always easy being a soldier.  I remember my first deployment very fondly.  It was heavily snowing and so cold it practically froze everyone’s butt off.  We had a task to protect our walker from Rebel attacks by disabling their bomber communications.

“Why couldn’t we blow up the uplinks?”  I ask my partner.
“I don’t actually know.”
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
“It means I don’t know!”

“Geez, touchy much.”  I activated my jump pack; blasting my frozen butt across the tundra off towards one of the uplinks, my partner following closely behind.  We hit the ground running, blasting some Rebels with our blasters and setting up a defensive shield around the disabled uplink.  Suddenly I heard a voice from my comlink.
“Rebel orbital strike incoming!”

“That doesn’t sound good, but I think we’ll be fine with this shield up, right?”  I turn to ask my partner, be he was long gone.  “Oh boy...” I sprinted away as fast as I could as I saw streams of lasers coming from a Rebel frigate hit the ground where I was standing.  One of the lasers hit the ground next to me and I was blasted off my feet and hit the ground hard.

“Yo you okay?”  I could hear my partner’s faint voice calling out.

“Is that you dude?  You know, I would start yelling at you for leaving me alone with the death beams from the sky, but right now, you have no idea how happy I am to hear your voice.”

“Yeah yeah, cut the chit-chat and let’s go.”  He helped me up.  We heard the screeching sound of overhead bombers as they completed their first bombing run.  One of our walkers suffered severe damage, but the other was completely fine.

“That was a close one, wasn’t it?”
 

“Yeah, yeah it wa-”  A stream of green sliced through the air.  I watched in fear; yet a sense of awe overwhelmed me as it cleanly went through my partner’s head, leaving a crumpled body on the snowy ground.  Another hit me in the arm, sending a blast of pain all over my body.  I pulled out my grenade launcher and blindly shot in the direction of the snipers as a distraction so I could escape with my jump pack.  I was successful, but I celebrated too soon.  One of the snipers was able to shoot my jump pack, sending me out of control and crashing into the snow.

“Ugh... can this day get any worse than it already is?” I groaned as I got back up on my feet.  Then I heard it.  The dreaded sound of a lightsaber activating behind me.  I slowly turn around; coming face to face with the Jedi Luke Skywalker.  I shout for help; none came.  I ran the best I could towards my nearby allies for support.  I heard a loud “whoosh” and saw the Jedi standing in front of me, giving me a stupid smirk.  I looked down and saw that I was cleanly sliced in half.  I fell to the ground, darkness slowly enveloping me.  The last thing I saw was the jedi be surrounded by my allies and fired repeatedly on.“

“Argh!  Come on!”  I shout with the fury of the heavens itself as I throw my controller across the room creating a dent in the wall.  “How come he gets to be a hero?  He has 0 kills and like, 15 deaths!  I deserve to be Darth Vader because I have 25 kills and only 2 deaths, not him!  Man this game is a load of bull!”  I furiously yell a few more words, some that should be not written down to keep this story PG and forcefully ejected the disc out of my PS4.  “I’ll play go back to playing Uncharted.  At least there isn’t any stupid idiots ruining the game with their cool gear or weapons or-or-or their “MLG Skillz”!  There’s only predictable, easily toned down AI that are fairly simple to kill.”  I inserted the disc, cursing the gamers I played against in the previous game.   And that was my first time playing Star Wars Battlefront and I haven’t touched that cursed game since then and will never play it again as long as I live.  (Or until an update comes out that is).