Some girls remember their first love as the one that was the most unbelievable one. But I would always look back at it as the one where my heart was ruined forever. It’s the one day that will eternally stick in my heart forever. I will never fail to remember how hard to was to move to another although he moved on in a few days. I will never in my life forget how much I drained  myself in tears or how rough it was to notice happy couples and thinking that it will at no time be me. I don’t remember who he was but I know his the ghost who hunts me forever. But yet I never hear him nor do I ever see him yet he comes to me as a dream. The guy who hunts me broke me, hurt me, and shredded me in half. It was difficult for me to smile no matter how much I wanted to but, throughout my years of growing up I was able to deal with it when someone broke me in half. Yet one question stays in my heart is where is the one who will cherish me for me I am and won’t let cry won’t let me down? When I first had my heart sheared in piece I had nowhere to go I was lonely. I never want to forget how the following day I saw him kiss someone else. I can’t longer remember his deep tone nor do I flash on the way he held me close when I was afraid. It’s like a kaleidoscope of memories which all comes back but he never does. Sometimes I think how could the devil be pulling you towards someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? I don’t remember him being mine I remember him being hers. I think the hard part wasn’t losing him it was losing me. All the dreams I ever had about him or the things I planned I start to regret them now when I discovered who he truly was isn’t who I wanted. But maybe that was the relationship between the two of us it was just a big fantasy that never existed. I was just chasing after me like a nightmare that never wants to come to end. His still this appearance that hunts me threw all my relationship wherever whoever I end up with I hear him laughing I see him ruining my love for the one I’m with. I never thought that heartbreak could be so strong so powerful that it would stay my heart forever it’s like the memory that never dies.  He was the one who made me afraid of relationship frightened of love his is the reason I can’t no longer have faith in another guy. Could actually something last forever? Could something last for a long time? I never want to forget how much it hurts to see someone you fell so deeply for leave or see them with another. Looking back at the pass I could see how much I suffered for him and how much I wanted to change his thoughts about me but it was a waste of my time. All this time I was wasting, hoping he would come around I've been giving out chances every time and all he did is let me down.  I still remember the look on his face the words that he whispered to me for just us to know he told me he loved me but yet he disappeared. Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met thought out my life I only wish to wake one day and know his no longer chasing after me. But that day never came his nightmare that chases me hunts me and scares me. Although it hard to forget him I no longer know who he is or what power he has to make me suffer,