The first day came, it was time. The first day of 6th grade, junior high. I was only 10 years old, a few months younger than all of the other students. My hands trembled, and my nerves had kicked in. I only knew and recognized one person, one face. She was my cousin, one grade above me. She guided me, finding me friends, making me noticeable. As of right now, I was just a lost fish in the sea, an invisible one. I couldn’t make up my small mind, I didn’t know what to say, do, or even how to act in front of all these new people. I was the new kid, no one knew me, no one knew what to think of me. I wanted to crawl in a hole and stay there until the very end of the day, when I felt better to go back home to my mom and dad. I really didn’t want new friends, I just wanted the same ones I had. I needed to be alone, so, after the very first class, I decided to seclude myself from all the other people. To do that, I headed for the bathroom, and I stayed there. Didn’t ever wanted to come out, I didn’t even have to use the smelly room, just needed my space. It was horrible, I felt small, stupid, and non-existent. Why couldn’t I just go back? All I wanted was my old friends, the ones that had loved me, for me.
The first 2 weeks went by, I made one friend, named Shi. We did everything together, she was my new best friend. She played basketball, so I figured since we did everything else together, I had to play too. Everyone encouraged me, they obviously knew I wouldn’t be the worst player on the floor. I just had a feeling that I would be though, and I was right. I was horrible. I didn’t know where to go, what to do, how to do this, how to do that, it was complete and utter chaos. I felt stupid, lame, but they kept encouraging me, and hey, it was only my first day. Everyone watched me as I grew to become a pretty good little player. I was on the starting 5, made my first basket, scoring 2 for my team. The lady lions, that’s what we were, and I never wanted it to end.
My 7th grade year came, and holy it went by fast. There were such dark, and depressing days, then there were the happy, and bright days. I made so many new friends, and I was actually kind of popular! I had a couple crushes, and was a major flirt. I talked to all the boys, I guess you could say I put myself out there. Then, one night, I got on my phone, just sitting on my bed, and got a bizarre text message. Not sure who the person was, but I had many thoughts and ideas racing around in my head, I paralyzed myself, not knowing how to answer. Someone had just asked me for naked pictures, and I didn’t even know who it was! I was taken back by the words and how they had arranged them to be sentence. Come to find out, it was one of the boys I had a crush on. I was in shock, I didn’t know that in 7th grade, boys would be like that, so open, and inappropriate. So naturally, I needed to know why he’d say such awkward things. I wasn’t sure how to answer, I was only 12 and didn’t know how to act. I wasn’t very mature, but I knew that sending inappropriate pictures was a crime. Literally, it was illegal. His reasoning was that he was bored and simply wanted to have fun. With that in my mind, I carelessly said no, and thought that would be the end of it. Boy was I wrong. Every single night I got more texts, more disgusting questions that I didn’t know how to go about answering. Why me? What made me seem like I would actually do those things? I was scared, but I was also curious. What would happen? Where would him and I’s relationship end up? I needed to know.
The next couple weeks were weird, awkward, and quiet between him and I. I felt like him and I were growing apart and I really didn’t want that to happen. So obviously I was glad that on this one day, every time in class, I would look over at him, he was already staring at me. He would be smiling, the same person I had a huge crush on. For a moment, I felt relieved, knowing that he still was who he was. The best thing was, I knew he liked me. You could tell by just the way he looked at me, and hugged me, and talked to me. I finally understood why everything he said felt like it threw me up against a wall. He just wanted me to be me, he wanted everything to be just like everyone else’s relationships. I never did send anything weird to him, and I probably never will. I was almost flattered when I got his text message that day, at that moment. He made me feel wanted, in a twisted way. We’re a couple now, and everything is perfect. He made me, well, me, and I feel wonderful.