It's Just a Four Letter Word

February 14, 2014
They make fun of it in the movies, adults make jokes about it, and they all told me I would get over it. The day has replayed itself over and over in my head, countless times, since the day it actually took place. The one thing that makes me laugh the hardest is that I actually believed it myself, that I would get over it, that I would get over him. It was at first sight, maybe it was love, it was too quick to tell. I do remember the way he looked at me when I stepped out of the car, my friend who was dropping me off stared in awe at all the kids running in my yard, they were the usual ones to greet me, except for him. His eyes were locked on me, and I almost felt uncomfortable stepping into my own yard.His name was unknown at that point in time. It was unknown until it was cued by a friend.

“Matty” he would shout
The name echoed in my head as if it was a hallway, and it was bouncing off the walls, down the hall.
“Matty, Matty, Matty”

The night went by fast, the best memories were when we would both slink behind my tree in the backyard, attempting to hide from whoever was ‘it’ in our game of flashlight tag. The moon would shine high above our heads. I remember going behind the tree, weeks later, trying to feel the same way as I did the night when our hands would brush as we scooted closer together to try and keep any clothing from showing outside of the tree. I remember laughing and screeching when we would sight the flash of light that would squeeze through the tree branches and we would fly around the yard. The night ended with a small smile, and he fled back down to the house with my friend. It was over, too soon.

I thought of him for an entire week, never imagining that I would be able to see him again. A week went by and I recall my mom coming into my room fairly late at night. She told me we would be going to wolfie’s house for dinner and she said that he was going to be there. Matty? it was almost as if he knew I wanted to see him again.

The way I felt was a mystery to most people. It was all mysterious to me as well. I hoped that the way I felt day to day would never end, that it would never fade away, because it was incredible.

Flash forward to the day I saw him again, it had been another long day of school, and the only way I had gotten through it was knowing I was able to see him that night.

I walked out of my house and wandered down the street to where I saw him. The feeling of exhilaration overtook me, and I felt like I was walking on a cloud and if my gaze drifted away, that I would fall through and hit the pavement, which was reality.

He turned, ever so slowly and it was the moment, the moment I had waited for, the moment where I saw his smiling face again, and he was smiling at me.

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