Sometimes I wonder... | Teen Ink

Sometimes I wonder...

October 2, 2013
By TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
16 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't know the key to success. However, the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby


Sometimes I wonder why people are such jerks. No, let me put it better. Sometimes I wonder how people can be such jerks. I understand... they have problems. So do I. And I don't go shoving my fist in other people's face. Calling them names that will appear in their dreams. Being rude because of their lifestyle or religion.

I always tried to push it to the back of my head. Sorta pretend like it never really happened, or that I had more friends than haters. Or I would just think, Hmm being called Barbie isn't that bad. Is it?

And then there's those people who you don't really know if they're being nice or sarcastic. "Cute hair" is a very complex phrase. These people, I feel, like to hurt people. But these are the same people who when they get caught say "Oh no I didn't mean it that way. I really like your hair." But they don't just say "Really" they say "Reeeeeeealy" They stretch that E like those skinny jeans in the back of your drawer that you've been dying to wear. Maybe even more.

Then, there are those people who couldn't be more blatantly obvious. "You know, I really hate you." I've heard it so many times. Those people who just say it. "Wow, you have terrible camel toe." Is very common. Just shouting out "I see your butt-crack" or "Your zipper is down" is expected of them.

It doesn't really matter how you're bullied, it's still bullying. And it's horrible. It's weird how every where I go, people hate me. I'm kinda numb to it now. Normally I laugh at the cliche "prostitute" or "Barbie doll". It's almost like nothing really hurts me anymore. So I just stop trying. But on those nights when you lay awake in bed, it comes to you. It hits you like a tidal wave.

Even though I'm numb to it now, I can't recall the last time I felt brave. There are times where I can stand up for myself, but I'm always insecure. There comes a point where you're insecure to the max. When you get to this point, you're so insecure you don't care anymore. You basically invite hatred. You look that wonderful hater in the eye and say "Yeah? What you got next?" And it's not fun. Because you're unsure of yourself. You don't know... you.

Do you ever feel like when people see you, they see a whiteboard to write on? Some people use EXPO markers and you can wipe it right off. But a lot of people use Sharpies. You can wash it off, and it eventually fades, but it will always leave a stain. And people will notice it. And you won't be able to write over it because it's defected. You'll always have that blemish.

I have no advice for you. Nothing helpful to say. I've heard it all. "It's not your fault", "They're just jealous", "Ignore them", "You'll get over it", "Wounds heal", "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you." Yeah? Well sure wounds heal, but they will always leave a scar. And people will notice it. And you won't be pure, the way God made you. But your battle scars tell a story. You've been through a lot. Treat those scars with some scar cream. Do it for me. And remember- Pills don't help treat the scars. You need time.


The author's comments:
I've been bullied for my whole life. There is nothing anyone can say to make it better. And you will go through hard times, and there will be pain. But you know what? I believe in karma. And that's the end of the story.

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This article has 8 comments.


on Oct. 8 2013 at 7:28 pm
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 381 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

I like it! Wonder why they changed it... Heh heh heh, we're both rebel writers now ;P

on Oct. 8 2013 at 5:27 pm
TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
16 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't know the key to success. However, the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby

And you won't be perfect, the way God made you. But your battle scars tell a story, and I'm sure you've been through a lot. But for me, treat your scars with some scar cream, and time.

on Oct. 7 2013 at 8:14 pm
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 381 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

...Dare you to post it here.

on Oct. 7 2013 at 1:50 pm
TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
16 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't know the key to success. However, the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby

Teen Ink :/

on Oct. 6 2013 at 9:44 pm
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 381 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

Who's the they that changed it?

on Oct. 5 2013 at 1:13 pm
TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
16 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't know the key to success. However, the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby

Okay, for all the family freaking out abou this article, calm yourselves. I'm fine. <3

on Oct. 5 2013 at 11:39 am
TimexxFlies GOLD, Sunland, California
16 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't know the key to success. However, the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby

Thanks :) I'm glad I wrote this (they changed the end, the part about the pills... I don't know why.). It's on the front page now so I'm sorta proud. And by the way, we gotta get stared on that secret society... what do you think?

on Oct. 5 2013 at 11:28 am
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 381 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

I'm sorry to hear you've been bullied. I used to get a bunch of B.S. everyday too. Mostly back in middle school. My addvice to you is just be so nice people won't hear a bad word about you but still, you've gotta do what's right for you. I really like your white board illistration that's a good one. Sweetie, no one's perfect and by now we're all damaged goods. Stay strong and breathe deep. You've given some good addvice in this article and your ending was very strong. I think your are brave for writing this and even more brave for posting it.