Elephant's Memory | Teen Ink

Elephant's Memory

December 7, 2011
By Anonymous

Abuse. Physical, verbal, emotional, mental, sexual, and a lot more. this is my personal story about being Abused physically, mentally, emotionally, and verbally daily for a year and a half. He was someone who was supposed to be my best friend. And there's no denying he was for a while. And then, things changed fast. He was suddenly drawing back. It stared when he smacked me in the face for the first time. At the time, I thought nothing of it. As time passed it got worse, and a lot more frequent, for a while it was just an occasional punch or kick, I passed it off as a joke a friendly gesture and nothing more. But, the longer it went on- the worse it got, there was kicking, jabbing, smacking, spitting, punching, throwing, biting,choking, bruising and even leaving me to the point where i could barely move. I don't know why i didn't leave sooner. I can still feel his finger nails digging into my arm calling me a w****, a freak, telling me i might as well kill myself because everyone would be better off- as time grew i began to believe those things myself. I remember the flash of immense pain ad his fist glided into my face- knocking me against the concrete wall. To this day i can feel each sharp flash of pain while he relentlessly kicked me while i was on the ground. Choking me until i was blue in the face and almost blacking out. I remember his fake apologies. I forced myself to believe him because i couldn't bring myself to believe he really was a monster. I couldn't begin to fathom it. Every day i smiled and assured him he was forgiven, then later being faced with so much abuse, then in my room alone at night drowning in tears and hurt. Emotionally and mentally beating myself calling myself a looser, weak, and stupid. I can still recall falling asleep hoping never to wake up again, that way i wouldn't have to face him ever again. I remember having to cover the bruises with make up and hide my true pain from my family and friends. I was terrified. I lived like this for so long until i finally broke down on the phone with my grandma. I got out. And even though the monster is gone. His words and actions will forever haunt me. Even though he's gone. He'll always be a part of me. As much as I would like to pretend it didn't happen I know I can't force myself to believe that lie. The monster absolutely destroyed my self-esteem and self-worth. And I know he's gone, he'll never hurt me again, he's stained into my heart, and I don't think I'll ever be able to forget him. When good things happen we savor them, but eventually loose complete memory of them. When things traumatic like this happen, We all have an Elephant's Memory...


The author's comments:
This story is 100% true. I wrote it because it's been eating away at me for a while. I hope this can help someone if anyone else is going through this, please get help.

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This article has 55 comments.


on Nov. 15 2015 at 10:10 pm
emmakate45 SILVER, Avon, Connecticut
6 articles 2 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”― Dr. Seuss

It is so brave of you to share your experience. I hope it helped you feel at least a bit better about what happened, and I feel so awful that it happened at all. Stay strong.

on Nov. 5 2014 at 11:48 am
TeoTheLostBoy BRONZE, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You can't tell me there's something then leave me with nothing."

Woah. Sometimes I read things like this and look back on my own memories, and then I'm so glad that I'm no longer in that situation but still hurt that I was ever there. 

Acaruso BRONZE said...
on Dec. 1 2013 at 7:37 am
Acaruso BRONZE, Baltimore, Maryland
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be." Sonia Riccoti

The last few words really it it home. Wow, amazing!

Allen said...
on Oct. 9 2013 at 4:29 am
I can't imagine too.So scared.

on May. 20 2013 at 8:55 pm
readlovewrite SILVER, Greensboro, North Carolina
7 articles 1 photo 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be quick to listen, and slow to speak, and even slower to judge."

Wow, this is really great writing.  It must be a relief to finally have gotten through it and be able to look back on it as a memory only.

bigblue GOLD said...
on Jun. 28 2012 at 4:44 pm
bigblue GOLD, New Market, Maryland
16 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All you need is Love."-The Beatles

ThisPlease keep your comments positive and constructive. We'll remove anything inappropriate. Thanks!

bigblue GOLD said...
on Jun. 28 2012 at 4:44 pm
bigblue GOLD, New Market, Maryland
16 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All you need is Love."-The Beatles

ThisPlease keep your comments positive and constructive. We'll remove anything inappropriate. Thanks!

bigblue GOLD said...
on Jun. 28 2012 at 4:44 pm
bigblue GOLD, New Market, Maryland
16 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All you need is Love."-The Beatles

ThisPlease keep your comments positive and constructive. We'll remove anything inappropriate. Thanks!

bigblue GOLD said...
on Jun. 28 2012 at 4:44 pm
bigblue GOLD, New Market, Maryland
16 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All you need is Love."-The Beatles

ThisPlease keep your comments positive and constructive. We'll remove anything inappropriate. Thanks!

on Jan. 17 2012 at 3:20 pm
Precious_15 SILVER, Pineville, North Carolina
7 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live life with no regrets, and all smiles . !

wow, this is deep. really deep.. but im glad u can share ur story..

on Jan. 17 2012 at 3:12 pm
redAKbabygirl22 BRONZE, Mountain Village, Alaska
2 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Life to the Fullest

geez, that is just horrible! sounds just like what happened to a close relative of mine. but shes getting over it, i helped her through with it

on Jan. 17 2012 at 3:05 pm
recurring_resilience SILVER, Ashburn, Virginia
9 articles 0 photos 92 comments

Favorite Quote:
"These are the times that try men's souls." - Thomas Paine.

"You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am." - On the Water Front

"This is my place of failure."

Gruesome.. I can't even imagine...

Mani2x SILVER said...
on Jan. 17 2012 at 3:00 pm
Mani2x SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
8 articles 0 photos 52 comments

Favorite Quote:
I was born an original, I'm not going to die a copy.

This is great. I am speechless

Mani2x SILVER said...
on Jan. 17 2012 at 3:00 pm
Mani2x SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
8 articles 0 photos 52 comments

Favorite Quote:
I was born an original, I'm not going to die a copy.

This is deep...Just amazing..hinestly, wow im speechless

on Jan. 9 2012 at 8:15 pm
alligator6 SILVER, Neenah, Wisconsin
6 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

this is amazing... i can't even put how i feel about it into words. it's just amazing.

laverne BRONZE said...
on Jan. 9 2012 at 8:06 pm
laverne BRONZE, Chicago, Illinois
4 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"dream's is only within the view of the catcher"

i love this so much that i can feel the words as if they were upon my skin.. creative

on Jan. 8 2012 at 4:49 pm
6FTBEAST BRONZE, Lynchburg, Virginia
1 article 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
WAZ UP FOOL!!!!!!

This is beautiful, i cried when images of him doing this do you ran in my head.

on Jan. 7 2012 at 12:05 pm
lezziefarie GOLD, Palestine, Texas
13 articles 2 photos 18 comments

Favorite Quote:
sometimes you get away with a mistake and other times life forces you to watch the one you love, love some one else......

thats good perfect decription of how it really does happen

on Jan. 7 2012 at 12:03 pm
kiLLaBLoke3 GOLD, Kegalle, Other
13 articles 3 photos 113 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never worry if u have or had any bad, bitter experiences, because, that can be what made u perfect or better than how u were.

u've got it all in order and thats perfect.... nice one, good writing, keep up ur work!

on Jan. 7 2012 at 11:33 am
NightGoddess17 PLATINUM, New City, New York
34 articles 0 photos 63 comments
wow... this is well written and very shocking... i want to say i can relate, but i really can't. Not in any way.However, I'm glad you were able to get the whole story out. Keep moving on with your life.