I now believe it’s only when you see some else’s entire world dying before them you realize that your problems are about as significant as a grain of sand on the rings of Saturn. I now believe it’s only when you see a grandmother cry a monsoon of tears, and scream out at god asking “why?” you realize the tears you cry at night mean about as much as offering condolences to a mother at her child’s funeral. I now believe it’s only when you see someone’s life being snatched away from then just as quickly as they were blessed with it you realize that every single breath you take is one more than someone else ever will have. I now believe it’s only when you witness a mother never getting to see her newborn child you realize that the worry you face on a day to day basis is not worry, but only pitiful paranoia that can be forgotten. I now believe it’s only when you see how difficult it is for a father to sign over his two minute old daughter, and to fill out consent forms for unreal procedures that strangers will perform on her you realize that the essay you write in English class every week is enjoyable. I now believe it’s only when you witness the single most important moment in someone’s life become the most miserable moment of their life you realize that you need to begin counting the little moments that make you smile and laugh in yours. I now believe it’s only when you hear the ear-piercing silence of a delivery room because a baby refuses to cry you realize that listening to someone talk your ear off for hours upon hours about something you could care less about is actually worth your time. I now believe it’s only when you see six nurses poking and prodding at a lifeless five pound baby, shoving wires in her arms and tubes down her throat, you realize your annual flu shot tickles. I now believe it’s only when you see a doctor who has been working for twenty five years freeze, and question reality you realize everything in this world is unexpected and some things happen without reason. I now believe it’s only when you feel every person’s heart in the room drop to their feet you realize making a fifty on a test is a laughing matter. And I now believe it’s only when you hear the sharp, unmistakable ringing of a heart monitor going from one hundred and forty five to zero you realize that God does things for His own reasons, and as humans we cannot understand why or how He could do such things to such undeserving people, but we must carry on with our chins held high and our faith in His hands because we are only human, and humans can only do so much until it’s His turn to take charge.
"Let Go and Let God"
November 23, 2011