Love Comes With a Price

July 18, 2011
By Anonymous

In times of being a teenager, I have experienced unrequited love. Starting February 2010, things will change for me. New students came in and I found a Chinese boy that I thought had a socially awkward personality. The teachers announced the Bible Speech Arts Competition and not much people participated. Lauren, Katy, Faith and Rebekah participated. But what surprised me most was when George decided to participate. One thing I know, he wouldn’t participate without a reason. Maybe it was to prove himself to people or to defy his own individuality and be different then when he was back in Tennessee. When he spoke, everyone sitting on the squeaky, chapel chairs shut their mouths. We lay all eyes on George and as he went on, the words in the speech were so deep and original. He talked about the Olympian that went to China and his moving story of moving from the USA to China. When the speech came to a close, everyone clapped loudly. Not me, or out school has heard a person spoke putting words to good use. I was in the audience and liked it so much that it moved me. Me and my friend loved the speech, it got me talking about it. I couldn’t stop because I felt I judged him brutally by physical appearance. My lesson for this day was not to judge someone before knowing them.

On March 2010, George was in my 2 classes for the semester, Geography and Comprehensive Arts. Around March, Mr. May assigned asked our class to split into groups consisting of 3 days students and 3 dorm students, 3 boys and 3 girls, it made a group of 6. In the morning our groups was the first to make a group, we had Andrea, Sarianna, me, Devon, George and Jeffrey. On Monday, I went to study hall in the computer lab to finish the project with George and Sarianna. As George and I worked to the end, I was wondering what would happen the next day in Geography class. George looked at me knowing something is bothering me. He told me not to worry and when he said that it made me feel alright. And so, I realized no other guy would tell me it’s alright but him.

On May, Ms. Halls our teacher began a project that would be presented on Arts Night called the Grade 9 play. As we browsed the Internet online for scripts of various plays, our class chose Sherlock Holmes and the Emerald of Alcazar. This play was about mocking Sherlock Holmes’ various cases in London, England and was a mystery-comedy genre. For most classes on May, we met in the gym preparing for the play. If it was going to work, our class had a choice of being put on cast or crew. I ended up a Crew member and George landed a main role as Sherlock Holmes in the Grade 9 play.

During the process of the Grade 9 Play, Sherlock Holmes (George) and Watson (Matthew) has exited their scene. I was in charge of the sound and lights but Ms. Halls wanted me to sketch out a plan for the lights as she cues on the choices of sound effects I picked. I was reading my script first and laughing at the things I found most funny in the play. I hid under the bar table and attempted not to attract attention. My breathing sounds tended to be loud in the silence backstage so George found me under the table.

This is how I fell for him, he asked me how I got inside the table. I just told him I sat down but at the same time, my brain released chemicals such as adrenaline instantly making me fall for someone this unique and handsome. I immediately thought he would be the one I would love for a long time. I saw him again and he said hi to me. It left me speechless, I felt nervous but I said hi anyways.

One year later
It’s been a year since I liked George but this is where it officially ends. First of all our relationship had no progress. Second, me and Mr. Right had our own busy schedules which means it wouldn’t work out. This summer on July 2011, I went on Facebook recently and out of no where, I ended up getting an inbox message from George. It started like this: “Dear Danielle, you might not be expecting this from me...” I went crazy as in my head I thought of running in circles thinking of the message. I totally thought I was in trouble from the posting of his wall on Chinese people but instead I looked back in my head finding out it was a letter response from the love letter I put in his locker. I freaked out and deleted it assuming I would be busted by the time George got back to Canada in time for school. My mind blanked out when I was trying to fill in the missing blanks of the letter response, all I remember was “I’m not a hater” and “I love you.”

I had a third thought, so today on Sunday, I went on Facebook to find notifications of previous statuses. I decided to go to Jingpeng (George) Zhai’s Facebook profile and I was curious to what Alissa and George were talking about. Talking about being a creeper and not minding my own business, I know better than to have done it. What surprised me was George met an American girl named Leah and on his wall, he told Shelby. They wore pink together at the same time. Wearing the same colour of clothing as your lover was something that irritated me. Why? It just bothers me and it’s like being a twin of someone else. I guess I just wasn’t use to twins. But I clicked onto Alissa’s wall and saw George talk about Leah as if he was irrevocably in love with her as I was with him. As I thought about the picture of them being together, a knife came and split my one heart in two. Then tears came into my face and I cried silently realizing I’m stuck in this love triangle although I’m not sure if their friends. I felt like I was being lied to by my own love. It hurt so much so I got out the knife and cut my skin as I listened to Russian Roulette by Rihanna and Take a Bow.

This experience was painful of them all, it made me forget why I fell in love with George in the first place. As years pass by, I never want to see him again. Sometimes when something bad happened between us I wondered if I’ll ever be done with him. I look back and should’ve realized it was complete bull---- that he said he loved me. Maybe he said it to pity me for not finding a lover at the right time. No, probably I’m wrong, George and Leah are probably friends and are just wearing pink because they both liked it. But still mixed thoughts raced in my head and I feel paranoid.

Once this all goes behind, I plan not to associate with him anymore. I’m a quiet girl put in an awkward position facing all my problems especially with tolerating a love triangle such as this one. If falling in love meant there would be obstacles and conflicts, why did it happen to me?

The author's comments:
This is about a girl who's love was not returned from the guy she loved for 2 years. She tries hard to end it all in one place.

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