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Momentary Mute Messages

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The, "OMG! What on earth is he talking about!?" in a terrified kind of way. With the, "Eek! I have no idea (but I'm secretly [yet completely obviously] glad I'm not you)." conversation in about ten tremendously loud heartbeats with solely our eyes across wet rags and soap suds. Or the, "I LOVE YOU! Say something." and the unreadable (so maybe it's just wishful thinking), "You know. And you know the deal." blank stare. Followed by the fishtale headspin the human brain is painfully capable of because that deal was never agreed upon. All within the split seconds of my slightly delayed (yet still fairly quick) reflexes that make my neck snap around the moment the chance arrives after meeting your beautifully cold eyes. And the, "Can't you see I'd just like you to leave now?" glare which is entirely a one-sided conversation for it's obviously not reciprocated. Or let's go for the looking down because you're trying to hold back tears but desperately trying to send an ESP message with, "-.-. .- -. / -.-- --- ..- / .--. .-.. . .- ... . / .--- ..- ... - / .... --- .-.. -.. / -- ." which reads just like that because they never get the message. Maybe it's the, "I really adore you and I know my eyes can't smile but if they could they would be grinning. I like this." while your mind is racing like a Nascar driver at Daytona. And all you can see back is, "You're cute. *twinkle*twinkle*" which is nice but.. Well, but. Mostly it's the messages behind your own eyelids that are so unclearly clear. I know that doesn't make sense and if you think that it does, you're wrong because it doesn't. It's not supposed to make sense. The loudest silent messages are the ones we always never want to hear. And the ones we laugh about crying about. Along with the ones we smile at while our heart is shattering into a gazillion small huge pieces. Those messages.




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