Behind these Hazel eyes

March 1, 2011
By CanOnlyDream BRONZE, Birmingham, Alabama
CanOnlyDream BRONZE, Birmingham, Alabama
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
on your impulse,
swallow the bottle,
cut a little deeper,
put the gun to your chest."

I slam the door behind me and lead my miniature puppy outdoors. As soon as I know no one can

see, tears escape. If anyone was watching they would think I was being ridiculous. Nothing even

really happened why is she crying? That's what they would think. But just that tiny thing of my sister

being mean to me and being yelled at a little can spark memories. Things I wish to forget. I remember

things from a year ago, constantly being bullied because of my appearance. I never noticed it then,

never cared. Over the summer after seventh grade, I changed my appearance. After eight grade had

begun, all came the memories came back and hit me hard. I started to cry myself to sleep some of the

gloomy nights. It wasn't just seventh grade, but the many years before that too. Sometimes I wish I got

anastesia so I can just forget everything altogether. As the year has been progressing, I have gotten

grumpier towards my family. Every little thing they do seems to tick me off. My sister also teases me.

Usually while she's talking to a boy, so I also call it a flirting tactic. One night I asked her likes to

down me so much, and laughing she replied, “Because its funny,”. That answer disgusts me. I feel as if

that's all the sinful bullies reasons. People these days shock me. Looking up stuff online, I fear I may

have depression. But it can also just be a mind game.

I wipe off the tears and head back inside. Funny how Thunder chose now to not play around outside

like usual. I angle my head slightly downwards, and to the side of any people. I need to cover up any

signs of crying. I dont want them to ponder me with questions or tell me to “stop the crying”.

Memories like finding out my lunch money had been stolen by jerks or a guy saying loudly “ Are you

kidding look at her teeth!” And who knows what else they say when i'm not listening, Are in the center

of my thoughts. Funny how mean some people can be. No one knows the pain I hide, behind these

hazel eyes.

The author's comments:
I didnt really go into detail..

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