Normal Girl | Teen Ink

Normal Girl

November 25, 2010
By Anonymous

Everyone looks at me like I am normal. They see me as I am put together. But they are wrong. The person sitting next to me is my world. He makes me tick and knows me. But even him misses the truth. Everyday my clothes fit bigger and bigger. Never the same fit. I don’t even realized I missed my menstrual cycle five times in a row when some girl invaded my privacy of being late to gym everyday so no one could see me change. No one could see my fat bulging out of my jeans. I told her no I don’t have a tampon for you sorry as I am hiding behind a shirt that lay across my stomach. The girl walks away not noticing anything, that just happened in the locker room. Which was fine with me, I don’t care what she sees.
Now I am at home, the worst place to be. My sister teases me calling me a pig saying “oink oink”. I cannot stand it. I want to punch her but I don’t have the energy anymore. I a weak but I have to go workout for three hours no less. Dinner comes around I sit at the table with my best friend on my lap ready to get some scraps. We eat as a family then I go straight to bed because I am exhausted. I look at the mirror and it still bothers me. But even more that everyone is so excited no school tomorrow. I am dreading it. It is thanksgiving. Worst holiday ever invented. It’s so disgusting and all the smells and the puking of people overstuffing themselves. Why can’t I sleep all through tomorrow?
Kids are running around the table like animals asking every second when do we eat can I eat three pies? Its getting harder to avoid this holiday I am sitting next to nosey nelly who won’t shut her mouth. I move the food across my plate to look like I ate some I put some in my mouth and wipe my face with the napkin and spit it out. The food was gross it made my stomach turn. Everything in put in my mouth made my eyes role and my mind scream at me like I just put dirt in my mouth. Each time it went in my mouth it got worse and worse. Even my nosey nelly didn’t notice that my clothes didn’t fit and how I looked so good. No one noticed me change no one. May be I will never change. I like my new lifestyle I look good and nothing could change me.


The author's comments:
this is true story. i had a problem and will live with it evryday and i still get the feeling when i eat some times. when i skip one meal i cannt control myself. i skiped lunch yestrday and couldn't hlp myself i skipped dinnr and now breakfast. my mom yelled at me t eat somethig befpre we go to thanksgiving dinner and i tried yogurt took a bite and i want to puke. this awful experience with me being anorexic was 8th grade and i am now a sophmore and tis still happens to me. i cannot tand when people make fun of people for being to fat or anorexic because i kn ow whats going through your head. my biggest weight has been 120 i am 5 7 and my smallest was 98 pds before i got help.

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