My best friend hurt me. It might sound childish to some but to me, it was serious. I like to think of it happening over a month or two when actually it started we were beginning to become friends. I have never felt so used by her. After it was all said and done, I cut my ties with her and said good byes. Yet I still feel like she is still here, watching my every move and judging it, making rude comments, putting me down and honesty, I still have that wall. That wall I built to protect myself. That wall I built to keep her out. That wall I built to keep the hurt in.
Each and everyday, I got up to get ready for school and kept thinking it was my fault. It was my fault she walked all over me, and used me, and spread my secrets. As I built my wall up higher and higher, I became suddenly alone. I didnt want to be around anybody, and felt like I had been stabbed in the heart multiple times.
But I found something that saved me. I wrote and wrote and wrote for hours I would write to find that peace I needed from myself. I found it after writing a short story. I felt myself slowly fixing the still bleeding wounds she had left months before. Of course, life went on for her. It stopped for me, came to a complete hault and made me beg for forgiveness. I, eventually found that forgiveness deep inside myself to where I could wake up and truely look myself in the mirror. I worked to take the walls down, and since then I have. She no longer has that grip on me.
That doesnt mean it doesnt hurt, cause it does, and my heart was shattered to pieces only to be like a puzzle with jagged edges now.