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Pizza Pride Destruction

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Sports, school, and style are all things that people take pride in, but Andy Janis took pride in his cooking. His pride was destroyed one day when his little brother Garrett Janis and I were in first grade.

It was a beautiful spring day, the temperature was perfect, but the best thing was that there was only 20 minutes of school left, and then I would be going over to Garrett Janis’s house. Whenever I would go over, we would always have crazy times with each other and his two older brothers, Ryan and Andy. Andy had told Garrett and I that he had a special surprise waiting for all of us at home. Garrett and I just thought that he was going to pull a prank on us like the numerous times before. So the bus dropped us off, and we all sprinted to the door, entering the house dripping buckets of sweat from our race. Somehow Andy had beaten us all upstairs, by using a back door, and he was holding two gigantic pizzas, they had taken him three days to make both of these amazing pizzas. I knew that these pizzas were probably going to be one of the most delicious things we had ever eaten.

Andy had only put in one of the two pizzas, because they were so massive. After about 20-30 minutes of action packed football, all of us were hungry, and the pizza was done cooking. When the pizza was taken out, I swear it looked just like the gourmet pizzas you see come out of the brick ovens on T.V. and movies. This pizza was not just a normal pizza it was a deep dish, and I mean deep dish. It was a three cheese, and a homemade red sauce that just made your mouth water, the smell was like a Chicago pizza pub, as if you were actually there. The crust was baked to a perfectly golden brown color, and with just a little bit of garlic butter on it. It seemed as though it took an eternity for Andy to cut the pizza. Every second that we didn’t have that pizza in our mouths was just another second that we didn’t want to live.

Finally it was time to dish up our plates and eat this mind-blowing pizza. The pizza tasted even more delicious then what it smelled like. This pizza was justice to all of those fake pizzas that say they are “deep dish” or perfect. As I bit into it, the sauce hit my taste buds with a sweet and smooth flavor followed by a bit of bite. This set the precedent for me when it came to a pizza, and up until the age I am now, I still have not had a pizza that was as delicious as this one. The crust of this pizza was thick but still had a nice crunch to it. Andy knew that he had made a masterpiece of a pizza and that it was definitely something to be proud of.

I can compare eating that pizza to a climax of any thriller book or movie, but as everyone knows with every climax must come the downfall. Unfortunately it wasn’t the type of downfall that Andy wanted to have, my assumption was that he was thinking of us all being stuffed and just relaxing and talking about how amazing that pizza was. The downfall that did happen was the worst thing that could possibly happen. Ryan and Andy are two of the three funniest people that I have ever met, along with their brother Garrett, so obviously they are telling jokes and we are all laughing. We were only about three to five pieces into the pizza, and I was taking a drink of milk. Simultaneously Ryan had just said a joke (I don’t remember the joke) that made me laugh so hard, that the milk came spewing out of my nose like a fire hose. Any other time this would not have been a problem, it just would have added to the laughter going around the table, but the pizza was sitting right in front of me. The milk drowned the entire pizza, and there was still more than three fourths of the pizza left. Everyone just stopped and stared in disbelief at what they just saw. At first we all looked at the pizza and then we looked at Andy to find him with the biggest “O” on someone’s face we had ever seen. Garrett and Ryan at this point were now laughing harder than ever, because of what just happened. I thought that Andy was going to rip my head off and throw it out into the street. Andy was no little guy, he was about 6’4 and played varsity football, and I was a little first grader. He was extremely angry, but he remembered that he had made two pizzas so that took a lot of heat off of me.

Once again we had to wait another 20-30 minutes until the second pizza was done. The smell hit us even harder this time, because we were that much hungrier. The pizza was cut and we all dished up this time knowing that what had happened earlier was merely a freak accident. I had poured myself a cup of Mountain Dew to drink with my pizza. Everyone knew that someone was going to make a joke about what had happened earlier, and, of course, it was said right as I was taking a drink of Mountain Dew. My worst nightmare had become reality; the pop sprayed out of my nose even harder than it did the first time. It burned as it raced through my nose. I could feel some tears form out of the corner of my eyes. The pizza was doused with a mix of pop and fizz. Now Garrett and Ryan were laughing even harder than ever, and I was about to faint. Andy was furious, I knew I was trapped, and there was no way of getting away from him. On a regular occurrence Andy would give Garrett and me “Choke Slams” they were never out of anger, but just for fun. He was going to do a double “Choke Slam”. Garrett in one hand and me in the other, he brought us above his head. He bashed our heads together and then slammed us down with all his might on to his bed. As I was being slammed down, my foot flew up; the fan in his room was on high and swinging around as fast as a helicopter. My toe went up into the fan and it cut my toe, obviously he didn’t mean to draw blood, but it happened.

Ever since then, anytime I eat something that someone has made, I never stand next to it as I drink any type of liquid. I still feel horrible about ruining Andy’s unreal pizzas and his pride in them, but it has become one of my favorite stories to tell people.





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