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They're Comfy

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I step out of the room and to my locker, spinning the dial, trying to get it on the first time. It’s not too hard, the combo is my oldest brother’s birthday, (by some stoke of luck) so I don’t blank out and end up staring at it like I used to at my old locker last year.

“Hey!” She walks over, pushing through the throng of humanity in the hallway, babbling about the Social Studies test and how she just completely bombed it.

“Hey,” I rejoin. I open my locker, and free one arm from the duty of supporting my binder to start shoveling stuff into the tiny space that’s not already filled. My sleeve hangs past my fingertips, impeding me a little.

“Are you wearing one of those baggy sweatshirt you like so much again?!” She sighs. She seems to take my fashion indifference as a personal affront sometimes. “Why do you wear these anyway? They’re baggy and the zippers are always broken and even though you wear cute camisoles under them, it still looks… Blah.”

I freeze for a moment, not sure how to respond. So what? I love my hoodies! They’re vintage Abercrombie, technically, because my brother wore them 4 years before me and, with some of them, my other brother wore them as well, so they’re about 5 to 8 years old so I know no one else will have them? Do I tell her that? That they’re warm and I’m never cold even though the temperature in our school is always chilly? Or say that I just like the feeling of it draped around my shoulders, that it’s comforting and it’s like someone’s always there for me? Or that I don’t want to be scrutinized by the other girls and be made fun of and my hoodies cover everything so I don’t have to have them see me? Or since my brother’s leaving for college, and the other one’s already gone and been gone for 4 years, that I wear these to be just a bit closer to him? That maybe, if I wear what he wore, I’ll miss him a bit less? Or that maybe I hope some of his cool, his confidence, his personality, will rub off on me?

“They’re comfy.” I settle on my standard response.

“Fine.” She sighs. “Let’s get to lunch.”

And I walk right next to her, hands in the pockets of my comfy blue hoodie.



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one of the wise said...
Jun. 16, 2010 at 7:28 pm:
This is a vignette with great detail, and honest emotions and insights.
 
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