All things come to an end.

March 22, 2010
By , Abington, MA
That’s what I thought as I searched the bottom of my plastic cup for one last drop if iced tea. But it was gone and all that was left in its place was a pile of ice and a shriveled up lemon, squeezed dry of all its flavor, of all its life.

I think I am this cup. Once filled to the top with refreshing sweetness, but now drained down to nothing but melting ice and a worthless lemon. I’ve been swallowed, sucked dry of all my value. Abandoned in my pathetic emptiness. For all intents and purposes, I have come to an end.

Where does one go from here? Where can one go from here? I’ve been emptied out and discarded by the one that knew me the most.

My laugh has a hollow sound to it, my smile feels shaky and weak. My walk is clumsy and emotionless. My voice is no longer my own. I have ended; been finished off by a familiar hand.

Is there such a thing as rebirth? I’ve never been religious, never needed something to believe in. I believed in myself. I never needed a source for hope. I had faith in myself. But I need it now. I need to know I have a purpose, value, reason to be, that I’m not just taking up space. If I could just find one tiny drop of tea, one tiny piece of myself that is still left inside of me then maybe, just maybe, I can remember who I am.

Where did the person I once was go? I had strength and ambition, hopes and aspirations. I knew exactly who I was and exactly who I was going to be. Did all that just disappear? There has to be some part of that left within me! It must be somewhere! I cannot just let everything I knew, everything I was, disintegrate into nothing! Nobody can take that away from me except me. I am owner of myself. I refuse to give it up, to give myself up. I will remember who I was, what once made me who I am. One person does not get to decide that another is not good enough. I am good enough. I am valuable. I have not ended. I have only just begun.

Suddenly I find my cup has been refilled, my lemon replenished. I am alive again. Reborn.





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