Audrey Palmetto | Teen Ink

Audrey Palmetto MAG

February 24, 2010
By clairexaudrey PLATINUM, Bethel, Connecticut
clairexaudrey PLATINUM, Bethel, Connecticut
41 articles 3 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."
-Elizabeth Kubler Ross


I created her when I was five. I liked to think of her as my celebrity name, to be used when I became ­famous. I liked to imagine myself singing on a stage, or signing a book I wrote. I liked to think that my name would be plastered across clothing, written on notebooks, and used often in speech.

I liked to wish I were anybody but me, because I was an outcast. No ­matter what I said or did, I seemed to only have friends who chose me out of pity, not out of love.

So I would turn to my notebook and write as if I were Audrey Palmetto. As if I were that celebrity that every girl wishes she could be.

I wanted to be somebody. Anybody but me.

I hid behind that name like a mask as I wrote down my feelings on the ruled pieces of notebook paper. I played the role so well that even my friends thought I was Audrey Palmetto. I thought of myself as a secret actress. Everyone saw Audrey Palmetto smile, but only my journal knew I cried. Only my journal knew I was pretending.

I thought it was fun, at first, to play pretend. It was like playing house, or dress-up, one of the childish games you play when you're five, with fake happiness.

But I wanted real happiness. I wanted friends who you could call “BF4L” and not be lying. Someone I could be myself with, not my Dr. Jekyll-and-Mr. Hyde companions. I wanted real smiles instead of smiles that hid tears. I wanted true contentment. The kind money couldn't buy; the kind ­Audrey Palmetto couldn't give me.

So when I went to high school, I ­decided to start fresh. I didn't know anyone. All I had was a pen, a journal, and a new story to write.

This is where the real me began.

Through the poems and songs I wrote, I came closer to knowing myself. Not Audrey Palmetto. Not the famous celebrity of my dreams. I was finally able to rid myself of my fake identity, my invisible mask. And I started to unearth the person Audrey Palmetto had covered up all of those years:

Frizzy-haired. Self-conscious. Musician. Writer. A bit crazy at times. Sometimes too loud. Obnoxious laugh. A little boy-obsessed. Makes many mistakes. Learns from them. Writes about them. Understands the male psyche better than algebra class. Likes compliments, but strives to be humble. Sometimes holds back from saying what she really means. Stands up for herself. Has two best friends that she wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

Believes in heaven. Believes that everything happens for a reason. ­Believes in herself.


The author's comments:
I'm not quite sure how I began writing this, but it's sort of a self-reflection piece.

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This article has 8 comments.


TheJust ELITE said...
on Nov. 22 2010 at 9:34 am
TheJust ELITE, Ellenton, Florida
254 articles 202 photos 945 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I feel that a hero is somebody who will stand up for their values and what they believe in and that can take any form. People that have values and have thought them through rather than those who just do what they’re told."-Skandar Keynes

"When it’

Omgoodness! I love this! I read it in the magazine a while back and just now found it! This story is amazing!

on Aug. 3 2010 at 2:48 pm
clairexaudrey PLATINUM, Bethel, Connecticut
41 articles 3 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."
-Elizabeth Kubler Ross

thank you so much(:

on Aug. 3 2010 at 1:03 pm
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD, Martinsville, New Jersey
14 articles 1 photo 279 comments

Favorite Quote:
Worry is simply a misuse of the imagination.

this is great. really relatable.  but i wouldve liked ot know more about the fresh start.

on Aug. 3 2010 at 5:40 am
katiepickelsimer GOLD, Dededo, Other
13 articles 2 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
Throw your dreams into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love.

-Anais Nin

this is one of my absolute favorite:)

katiep said...
on Aug. 3 2010 at 5:38 am
this is truly amazing. It really really is. :)

on May. 29 2010 at 9:22 am
clairexaudrey PLATINUM, Bethel, Connecticut
41 articles 3 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."
-Elizabeth Kubler Ross

Thank you both so much!

Iamber GOLD said...
on May. 26 2010 at 11:06 pm
Iamber GOLD, Smiths, Alabama
19 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't think, don't judge, just listen." - Sarah Dessen

I love this!

on May. 26 2010 at 5:37 pm
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2216 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.
~Amoniel

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"
~Thesilentraven

This is amazin! I love it, please keep the writing up :)


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