That Girl...Who Had No Name. Chapter 1

January 16, 2010
By Anonymous

As I look at the light coming in from my window, I realize that just maybe life isn't always going to be as bad as it is now. Right their at that very moment I placed the knife that was once in my right hand down on the bed that lay next to me. I took the note that was on the floor next to me, and ripped it to shreds.
It reminded me of the time when my heart was torn to shreds by this boy. I was only 12 when I had my first boyfriend we thought we were going to be together forever...until our 8 month anniversary, the day he broke up with me. I still don't know why, he never gave a reason, but that really hurt me. It still hurts now even after 2 years. The pain has and never will go away.
In my room is a black bed with silver trimming. My bedspread is red and black with a gothy floral design. It's the biggest room in the house, and it's all mine. I like it here, I feel safe and secure. Nobody can come in unless I let them in. My window shades and curtains stay shut night and day, and I always keep my light off. The dark comforts me. I don't know why but I am always left out of everything. I never get asked to go anywhere, unless you consider my mom telling me to go to school as going somewhere. I like school it gives me something to do when I am bored. I used to like talking to friends and being social but now I just keep to myself. I eat my lunch alone and I don't talk in class like everyone else does. I am not the kind of girl you would expect to see. I am always trying to be the best I can be at everything, but I end up failing. In school I used be on the honor roll but now I am failing. My constant fears and my pitied tears are causing me to fail. I don't know what to do anymore. Now that I isolate myself I find life a lot easier. I don't have to deal with cruel teenagers belittling me and making innapropriate rumors about me. It's like I am invisible now. Nobody even knows I am there. I still cry everynight before I go to sleep but theres no sense in trying anymore my life is already a failure. I like to sleep all day and stay up all night writing away my pain. If I eat at all it's for comfort not because I am hungry. It's time to get some shut eye. 'Night.

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