Behind the Exterior | Teen Ink

Behind the Exterior

September 27, 2023
By 4greuel GOLD, Hartland, Wisconsin
4greuel GOLD, Hartland, Wisconsin
12 articles 0 photos 0 comments

The facts 

 My life. I am a 17 year old female who wants to become either an accountant or actuary as my future career. 

I love rom-coms and action movies. I love to spend time with my grandparents, specifically my mom’s mom and watch one of our shared favorite shows - Bones. She has also introduced me to other shows that have grown on me such as Scorpion. 

I moved to Oconomowoc back in 2020 right before I started freshman year. And I mean right before as in 2 weeks before. I also knew no one when I moved. Honestly, sometimes, it still feels like I know no one here or rather that no one here knows me.

I have one younger brother who is a sophomore at AHS. He is honestly more like a kid to me than my brother, but that is a whole other story in and of itself. 

This year will be my fourth year as an AHS wrestling manager - which I became because of friends and the fact that my brother wrestles and my father used to wrestle. It has been fun but also irritating at times. I think all sports managers feel that way though,(well at least all the wrestling managers feel that way). 

I have two dogs, an English setter and a miniature dachshund. Their names are Ginger and Needles. They’re both lazy and snugly dogs, which are “my kind” of dogs. 


These are the facts and this is my life.


The job  

I work at Applebee's in Delafield as their Carside person. The job is both good and bad if you ask me. The job is good because I make decent money most days. I keep all of my own tips which is nice. It is hard because I have worked the past 5 days in a row and never got out before 10:10 other than last night which I had to beg for. I am a student first, you know. I am also tired of constantly having to do stuff that is not in my job description. Example: on the nights we don’t have a host they make me do both, but only pay me to do one (How is that fair?) I work my ass off for them and half the time I don’t even get a thank you. Even when I do the extra stuff. 50 percent of the time they don’t even ask me anymore they just command me like I am a dog or something. I am sorry, but I am only one person and I can only do so much. I am not an octopus. I don’t have eight hands, I have two. This is pretty much me just venting, but honestly it’s hard. Last year I was putting in 30 or more hour weeks while going to school, which is fine. Sometimes I just need a break, you know. 


My MIND

Most of the time I feel lost. I don’t necessarily know where I should go in life and what decisions will bring me success. 

Socially I don’t have many friends, well I do, I just don’t trust them. How can you tell who is being real and who isn’t? I used to think I could answer that question and read people. However, this past year made me throw that thought out the window. 

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know anybody in the same shoes as myself such as everyone I know here at AHS has college funds. I don’t; I will have to take out two or three college loans. I don’t have luck. I don’t get let off the hook just because I tried really hard. 

It’s hard for me to accept that life isn’t fair because I constantly get the short end of the stick. I have always been the scapegoat. Now being a scapegoat is most definitely the short end of the stick and when you have absolutely nothing to do with the situation yet you’re the one blamed- I’d call that the shortest end of the stick and that’s the end I have been “blessed” with. 

 

KARMA

I believe what comes around goes around which is why I always just walk away and act as the bigger person, but that is so tiring to do. Why does everyone else get to act so immature and just plain rude and I don’t? A lot of people have the mindset of If they go low, I go lower although I don’t understand why. It just makes them look bad. I do my best to believe in karma but like I said it’s hard to be patient. I know better than to snoop to other people’s level and at some point I imagine it would be gratifying to say all the things my brain thinks about those people to their faces and make a scene. (minimal revenge- yet somehow seems so soothing) I won’t ever do that though - maybe I am too nice or maybe I am hoping that if I play nice I will finally stop getting the short end of the stick. Who knows? (I wish I knew) 


shooting stars 

I wish shooting stars were real and that all my wishes would come true. (I mean, doesn't everybody?) I also wish every once in a while I got stuff handed to me rather than having to work for it. I get that as an adult everything comes at a price, but why does it have to be that way in high school too? 


The author's comments:

This piece is honestly based on my life right now and how I feel in the moment. 


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.