No other feeling can match or come close to that of stepping out onto stage for the very first time as a lead. Not only bringing joy to myself as an actress, but bringing joy to everyone watching and around me is what truly brings me happiness.

After months of preparing and learning over 300 lines, I was finally ready to be the lead for the first time and to take on the massive role as a funny, little old lady named Abby Brewster in Arsenic and Old Lace. I felt anxious, excited, and nervous all at the same time. Opening night was a cold, rainy Thursday in January. The school day could not have gone by any slower than it did. But when the school day was finally over, I made my way to Brother Martin high school, where I would soon encounter the biggest moment in my entire life. As I trudged through the sea of boys with the ridiculous, wrinkly makeup I had to wear in order to truly embody the character of a sassy granny, the fact that that I would introduce this character to an entire audience in a couple of hours had finally hit me. The long walk to the girl’s dressing room only seemed to make me more nervous for the night as the smell of hairspray and baby powder soon surrounded me as I made my way to the room with the rest of my cast. As I slipped on the long black skirt, long sleeved, high collared shirt, and grandma shawl, I was preparing to step out into the bright light from the spotlights. I slipped my wig on, put some baby powder in my hair to make sure I truly looked like an old lady, and it was time to start. My stomach was turning as I heard the director call “Places!” Am I going to blank? Am I going to make a fool of myself in front of an entire audience? It was too late to back out now.

No, I can do this. I shook out all of my nerves, took a deep breath, and realized that this was the moment I’ve been waiting for. The love and support that surrounded me was as prevalent as the hundreds of wrinkles drawn all over my face. As I stepped out onto the stage for the very first time and felt the warmth from the glaring spotlight beaming, I suddenly realized, where has this feeling been all of my life? I looked across the stage and saw all of my best friends performing right there with me as I delivered my lines throughout the play. Being able to share this moment with all of my favorite friends meant the world to me. The joy of hearing laughter and gasps from the audience was what truly encouraged me to keep going as I was rolling through each scene with little to no problems. Giving it my all, I put all of my energy and focus into being the funniest, little old lady I could be, and this hard work and energy paid off. The positive reactions of the audience made me realize how much the sweat, work, dedication, and time that was put into this show was truly worth it, and I could not have been more proud of my cast, the student director, and all of the crew members. The play was over, and the time had come to take my final bows. I have done several plays, but these bows were particularly special to me because I had my own bow. That’s never happened before. Would the audience even clap for me? How does this work? I stepped out from the dimness of backstage onto the luminous stage with one of my best friends who played my sister in the play. As we walked out onto the stage side by side, the audience erupted with cheers and hollars. A standing ovation. I got a standing ovation. Was this really happening? The part of this whole night that meant the most to me though was the company bow. As a company, we all held hands and bowed together as one, to truly symbolize the bonds that this club had formed.

The joy and happiness I experienced from this play was what made this night one of the greatest moments in my entire life. Through this experience, I learned so much about myself, what I can handle, and what I am capable of accomplishing. I keep trying to find a way to express how grateful I am for everything this club has given to me, but I then realize that there are no words that can even come close to express how grateful I am.  I truly believe that this club is not a club, it is a family. A family with unbreakable bonds that celebrate with you and for you when you are happy and that console you and comfort you in your times of need. Despite people moving on to the next stage in their lives, such as college, I truly believe that the friendships formed will last a lifetime. Thank you, Dionysians, for filling my life to the brim with authentic joy and happiness.