On Saturday, October 27, 2018, sometime around noon, my mom was shaking my shoulders to wake me up. She was saying my name with urgency, but it took a few times for my brain to register that she needed me awake. “Wake up!”

“Why?” I said, angry.

“Don’t a lot of your friends live in Squirrel Hill?” she asked me.

“Yeah, why?” I asked, my eyes still closed, my body still half asleep.

“There was a shooting over there. It was bad. The president even tweeted about it.”

With those words, my eyes blinked open in disbelief. It took longer than it should’ve for me to realize what she was telling me. I picked up my phone and texted all of my friends who I knew live there. Most of them answered right away, telling me they were safe. One of my friends took a bit to respond, which was worrying. I texted him once, and then again ten minutes later. He responded ten minutes after that saying that he and his family were fine. They were eating lunch and that’s why he didn’t respond right away.

I typed the words “Pittsburgh shooting” into the search bar of my phone and immediately found tons of articles. A man, later identified as Robert Bowers, entered the Tree of Life synagogue in Squirrel Hill at roughly 9:54 a.m. armed with an AR-15 and three handguns. He killed 11 people, and injured 6 more. As he was exiting the building, he encountered Pittsburgh Police officers, whom he told, “They’re committing genocide to my people. I just want to kill Jews.” He then retreated back into the building, until he was able to be taken into custody. It was also reported that he went into the building yelling, “All Jews must die!” This was clearly a hate crime.

I’ve heard about so many mass shootings over the years that it shouldn't even be a shock anymore, and yet this one was probably the most surprising. Sandy Hook, Orlando, Parkland, Sutherland Springs, and so many more. They all seemed so distant. You think, This could never happen to me. But it’s no longer an issue we can distance ourselves from. It happened here, in Pittsburgh, twenty minutes from my house, and just blocks away from some of my closest friend’s houses.

I spent so many hours watching the news and looking at social media. Every platform was flooded with talk of the shooting. No one had all of the information yet. As I watched, and the death toll rose, I learned of a vigil planned to take place later that night. It would be at the intersection of Murray and Forbes avenues, a very well known spot in the neighborhood. With a few hours until the vigil, I took to social media and saw that Donald Trump had made a statement on the shooting. Part of what he said was, “If they had protection inside, the results would've been a lot better.” This man blames the victims of a violent  hate crime for not better protecting themselves. If only he could realize that this wouldn't have happened in the first place if the shooter weren't able to obtain an assault rifle. He failed to understand that guns have no place in a house of worship and peace. He also said that this attack had “little to do” with gun laws. He is false. If America had more gun control, and stricter gun laws, Robert Bowers would not have been able to get his hands on an AR-15. The same type of gun that was used at Sandy Hook, Orlando, Parkland, Sutherland Springs, and so many other massacres.

I felt like I needed to go to the vigil. I needed to be there to see my friends, to hug them. I needed to be there to be with my city. I went with two of my friends. We stood amongst the crowd of over 3,000 people as some people began singing. I later learned one of the songs that was sung was Havdalah, which is a prayer marking the end of Shabbat. We stood in the center of the crowd in an embrace, crying for the victims, for their families, and for our city. Later in the night, I witnessed something that shook me. I saw in front of me, a young woman on the phone, seemingly looking around for someone. She said, “Oh I see you guys,” and waved her arm. A younger girl ran up to her, shouting, “He died,” sobbing. I stared for a second, heartbroken for them, but then I looked away and began to cry myself. It was a moment I wish I didn't have to witness, but it happened. This was real. Robert Bowers took 11 lives, and destroyed the lives of many others. He put fear into a lot of people, in fact, into an entire city.

It’s become very apparent that we are no longer safe anywhere. Not in our grocery stores, our concerts, our movie theaters, our schools, or even our places of. worship. The list of places where we are safe from gun violence is rapidly diminishing, and if there's no change soon it may not exist at all. Gun violence is a problem. Gun violence has been a problem for so long now. It needs to be talked about more than it is. We must not forget that the incident in Squirrel Hill is not an isolated one. Mass shootings are happening more and more every day. We need stricter gun laws. We need more gun control. We can’t forget the victims of yet another tragedy. We can’t forget Joyce Fienberg, Richard Gottfried, Rose Mallinger, Jerry Rabinowitz, Cecil Rosenthal, David Rosenthal, Bernice Simon, Sylvan Simon, Daniel Stein, Melvin Wax, and Irving Younger.