I can clearly see the sunshine, but I’m stead walking through the rain. I’ll still walk through until I completely see the sun. No matter how hard it gets if I have god in my heart, nothing will mess with me. My whole world changed when he took my little brother from me, hit my knees, and with my head down I cried instantly. I’ve seen and I’ve had both sides of the field. The best of both worlds [yes I’m for real.] Well guys I stand alone, I’m walking through the rain but yet I move on. I just started so now I’m far from far. Patiently waiting but the best is still yet to come, I guess things happen for a reason when said and done. Keep your faith in god because he’s the one that led us. Diabetes are eating my insides messing my vision up I swear to god I feel like giving up! You probably think I got the world in my hands but really I have the world on my shoulders, things don’t really go my way but we can’t change a lot of things, a lot are made without notice. And some are brought upon us to control.

Now, there’s and angel in the sky watching over me, they say it’s always darkest before the dawn, and that you don’t know who you got until they’re gone. I thought I knew what I had but I was wrong. I wondered to myself what does it all really mean. Nothing without the people you love, I miss my brother but I know he’s looking down from above. I live my life looking up in the sky wonder if he’s still watching me. Wondering if I’m doing what he wants me to do and if I am, is it going the right way! It seems like yesterday sometimes sitting in your bedroom thinking about him, about to be in the world laughing and smiling at the site of your mothers belly. I wanted that little baby boy to come into this world but unknowingly his heart stopped. And I never thought I’d be sitting here writing this paper saying I miss you but it’s true. Every night I would sit there and pray to god that maybe he would bring my little brother back. Things become very hard, but if there is one thing I know to do, that is to stay with god no matter what. If you have god on your side things will be much easier. Just pray, it is amazing what can happen when your attitude changes from everything’s impossible, to have faith and just believe. People around the world ask god to come into their life every day, knowing and realizing that anything and everything through him is possible. Time flew by and my mother’s belly started to slim up and go back down to normal, as a family we were devastated. Now, knowing that the little boy would not be coming around anymore killed my mother. She had been working hard to have that baby, for about 6 months she had gotten to know the baby better that anyone. Time and time again my mother and I would set up at night and talk about what had happened. I was young, and at eight years old I didn’t quite know what was going on. But I understood enough to where I knew my little brother wouldn’t be coming into this world. Together every night, for about 2 months we got down on our knees next to my bed with are heads down and our hands up, and we prayed to god that maybe one day if ever tried again we could have another baby and it would turn out to be a boy!

Years pasted, we had gotten back to our normal lives trying to full fill our life dreams, trying not to live from the past. Still thinking about that little baby disappearing in our lives but not in our hearts, I was out doing what I love, mom called me in the house and sat me down. Just as I sat down and said what is it momma? She tells me “Colten, I’m having a baby! And it’s a boy!” Tears of joy run down both sides of my face, I immediately get down and thank God for what he has done, and what he has given this family. This could be the best thing for the family right now, with the past couple of years being hard as it has been. This little baby boy, that GOD has given us was by far “Another” one of God’s miracles