09/27/08
Dear Twizzler,
I don't know where you are or what you're doing, and if you wanna' come back to my house again and be with me or not. But I sure wanna' be with you.
You have no idea how much you meant to me or how much I miss you. But I wish you did, cuz then I know that even if you wanted to stay where you were you'd come back.
You were my best friend. There before I had my first boyfriend to talk to about everything. But even when I had Jordan, it just wasn't the same. I missed the way I would always just hold you back by our tree and pet you and talk, and even though you couldn't talk back, you were a really, really good listener. (not that Jordan isn't)
I remember when you were born. You were so tiny, smaller than any of your brothers and sisters...and how when I thought about putting a water bottle filled with warm water in it so you wouldn't be cold, I changed my mind, because the water bottle could've easily hurt you.
I remember when I had to bottle feed you because you were so small. Some of us were afraid you weren't going to live!, but you did. And I'm glad.
I remember a lot more things too, but I don't really feel like thinking of them or writing them down right now. It's way too depressing. But maybe I will later. When you come back.
There is one thing I would like to remember though, and always will. It's the way you were always there. You were there if I was mad at Jordan, or when he was gone or something. You were there when my grandma and grandpa died. You were there in the summers when all the neighbors would be playing with my sisters and I wouldn't have anyone to play sports with or anything. You were there when I just needed to talk to someone, but didn't feel like talking to one of my friends or sisters about it. You were there when Gaberial died. And when you were sick or something, I tried to be there for you like you were for me.
Playing tetherballs not the same...I miss the way you would always roll around the pole, chewing the grass around it. You weren't scared of getting hit though. You knew I would never hurt you. I still look down at the ground when I step up to hit the tether ball though, like I always used to watch for you so I wouldn't step on you. But you're not there. Basketballs not the same. Theres no little cat chasing the ball around on the road when I play. Rollerblading's not the same. Remember how I used to pick you up and spin around on them, with you snuggled up against me? I do. I miss it.
I got a new cat, Benson. I love him to death, but he's just not the same. I just can't talk to him the way I could talk to you. I'll be able to...it'll just take a while.
Trust me Twizz, you don't know what I would give to see those little yellow paws of yours come bounding over the little hill across the road, your head moving up and down with the rhythm. I always took you for granted. But you weren't just a cat. You were special.
I still call you, when I feed Benson and Pudge. I still call you when I'm rollerblading. I still call you when I'm playing tetherball. I call you any time I'm outside.
I know it's been almost two months since you've run away, but I know you're coming back. I just hope it's soon.
People keep telling me your not, that you're gone now. But I don't believe any of them. I know you wouldn't just leave. Not without saying good-bye anyway. I just tell them that you'll be back.
Wherever you are, Twizz, I just hope you know I miss you. And I want you back. I'm still waiting. Always will be.

~Brit