Dear Dad

June 6, 2008
By Emily Risley, Carson, WA

Dear Dad,

The day I heard the news I didn’t really understand. I just thought you’d be home for a while, to hang out you know have a good time. Mom got quieter, the family would stop by. They all were crying, talking about buying the ticket, she just refused. I was excited to see you when we were at the airport to pick you u, ready to jump up and hug you just like all the other times but it wasn’t the same. The ride home was quiet, real quiet. Grandma came over for a couple days to help out while mom was at work I heard you two talking. You started crying, I was shocked I couldn’t believe you were crying. The first time I had seen you cry. Something was wrong, after a week or so things started changing; you didn’t want anything to do with me maybe it just seemed that way. But you seemed ashamed as if the world hated you. You’d been home for awhile, getting better by the day walking again. You and mom seemed happier again, I heard the news you were going back to work! I was excited thinking finally again things would be back to normal. Everything was packed and ready to go, and then another attack came. Things changed, maybe for the worse. The family would stop by to visit; I would watch you push them away ashamed of what happened like it was your fault this had happened to you; it didn’t matter to me though you were still my dad. I still wanted to do everything you did but you didn’t seem to want me around much. I felt abandoned like I was left alone to survive. Sometime passed, I got older you weren’t there to help mom raise me. You were always out with your friends who mom didn’t want me around, so we separated more. Sometimes you’d take me out driving but only on occasions; mom was doing pretty much all the work on her own. I started getting in more trouble not really caring about anything. You’d get mad and yell when mom would leave for a while, you yelled at me once and I yelled back leading into a huge fight. You told me to move out and never come back. I was scared that I wouldn’t be able t. you seemed to be blaming me for everything for everything that had gone wrong. After that we didn’t talk maybe even avoided each other. We eventually started talking again but it just wasn’t the same. The house seemed broken. More time passed things seemed to get a little better, I was going into middle school my turn to be a 7th grader. I was taking sports and being with my friends I wasn’t home much but when I was our relationship was getting better. But something was still missing, you being a role model. By the 8th grade I was getting in a lot more trouble but nothing seemed to matter to me. Mom was the one doing the disciplining you would just half way be behind her decisions. You need to be there helping her it isn’t a one man deal. I need you around, to be my dad, to take me and do fun stuff, help me make the right choices, to grow to be the best I can. Will you do that, would you do that for me dad?


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