Unshed Tears

October 12, 2007
The ride here seemed to take forever, but I really wasn’t paying attention, since I had my book. But now we were here, my family, standing in the gazebo like structure, the ones who don’t fit in, just outside, taking shelter against the rain, under umbrellas. On my left, one of my aunts and uncles, on my right, my mom, my brother and my sister. In front of me, another aunt and uncle, beyond them, a flag covered casket. One man on either end of the casket, dressed in uniform, salute as “Taps” starts to play.

‘I will not cry.’ I tell myself, ‘ I am strong.’

“Taps” finished playing and they start folding the flag. in the cold, raw afternoon, my eyes are the only warm thing about me, in fact, they are burning.

‘I won’t cry. I refuse to cry.’ yet as I think this, my vision blurs, and tears build in my eyes.

The two men in uniform present the flag to my uncle, standing in front of me. I had been watching my aunt shiver with the cold, much as I had been, but now her shoulders were shaking . ‘No, don’t cry.’ I think, but my eyes won’t listen.

My family are some of the strongest people I know, and to see them cry so hard, it tears me apart. But I am a rock, I am strong. I … will … not … cry. I just keep telling myself that as I exit the building. Eventually it works, and there is no sign of the tears I almost shed only a few minutes ago.

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