Unconscious | Teen Ink

Unconscious MAG

August 26, 2008
By Samaiya SILVER, Medellin, Other
Samaiya SILVER, Medellin, Other
7 articles 0 photos 9 comments

There was a dead girl in front of the library this morning. She was breathing, but she wasn’t alive. Whatever existence she’d had during her few years – I calculated she was around 13 – certainly wasn’t life. She was tossed carelessly on the trash-­littered sidewalk in front of a boarded-up doorway, drugged and utterly unconscious of the world around her. The filth and stench of the city were caked into her skin. She seemed part of the garbage she was ­lying in.

My home in Medellín, Colombia, has a lot of poverty. I’m used to seeing dirty, starving children begging in the streets, unkempt old men sleeping ­under newspapers, and hopeless teen­agers forgetting their pain in glue and needles.

But this … this was different.

The girl’s clothes were pulled high above her chest, ugly testimony to what had been done to her the night before. Person after person walked by. Boys leered. Children gaped and were pulled away by mothers who wrinkled their noses and quickened their pace. Not once did I see a trace of caring.

I knelt down and shook her gently.

She stirred and turned her head to me, and a grimace flashed across her face. I realized she was no child. All concept of age was erased from my mind. Perhaps she was barely a teenager; perhaps she was as old as humanity.

“Señora,” I said softly. A fly alighted on her cracked lips, and I brushed it away. Still she did not wake. I don’t know why I cared. Certainly no one else did. But I couldn’t leave her like that. I couldn’t. I should cover her. I reached out to pull down her shirt but retracted my hand. I had no right to touch her.

I knew what I had to do.

Even as I pulled the sweater over my head, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to give my favorite sweater to someone who would just sell it for drugs. I didn’t want to care. But it was too late. Once you open your eyes and see reality, you can’t close them again that easily. And even though I wished I didn’t care, I did. She was a girl, my sister in ­humanity, a person just like me. God have mercy on us both.

I draped the sweater over her. The pulsating noise of the street suddenly quieted. The outside world ceased to exist, and a deafening ­silence enveloped us. Time slowed. The moment seemed eternal. We were the only ones in the universe – just me, the girl, and the dark blue sweater fluttering down in slow motion.

I had the sensation you get when you pull the sheet over the face of a corpse and say, muerto esta. The last fold of cloth settled on the gray cement, and suddenly time was once again going. I heard the rushing cars at my back, felt the burning sun, and smelled the filth. Nothing had changed.

I got up too quickly, nearly losing my balance. I needed to get away.

“La felicito,” an old man, who had apparently been watching me, said in congratulations. “Is it a little girl? So sad, so sad. What a shame.”

“Yeah … I don’t know,” I mumbled, hurrying away, horribly embarrassed that I’d been seen. Supposedly, when you do a good deed, you get a warm fuzzy feeling inside. But all I felt was a deep, aching sadness.

I used to believe those heart-warming stories about how people’s lives were changed by some small act of kindness. If this were one of those ­inspirational stories, years later we’d meet again. She would have risen from her poverty and pain, achieved success, and been converted to some nice religion. I’d be down about something, perhaps thinking that my life was worth nothing. On an impulse I’d step into a church and – voilà! – she’d be there giving her testimony about how she’d lived a totally empty and meaningless existence until her life had been changed by the act of a caring stranger who had covered her with a sweater.

And then I’d get up, with tears in my eyes, and shout, “I am that stranger!” And we’d hug and become best friends and I’d go home completely happy in the knowledge that my life had been good for something after all.

But this isn’t an inspirational story. The real world isn’t that nice. When the girl came out of her stupor, she probably wouldn’t even notice the sweater or wonder where it had come from. She’d use it to get more drugs. That night she would again sell her body and her soul, and the next day she would once more lie on the street with her shame open to the world. And my feeble act of caring would be worth nothing.

I headed down the street and sud­denly, to my disgust, found tears running down my face. I dashed them away, not knowing whether I was crying for that girl, my favorite sweater, or the fact that no one had cared.

I thought of the Jesus I’d been taught about in church. He would have cared, I think, if he’d been there. But he wasn’t there. I wished he were. It hurt.

People at church would tell me that he was there, that he’d cared through me.

I sighed. Maybe. Maybe.

But all the way home, the pain ­remained.



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This article has 482 comments.


on Jul. 8 2010 at 1:13 pm
pageturner PLATINUM, Brooklyn, New York
34 articles 0 photos 94 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's okay to daydream.. just as long as you get to do some of those daydreams.

it's true. no matter what small deed anyone does, there's always millions of troubles for every one person we help

on Jul. 6 2010 at 7:13 pm
KirbyDoodle BRONZE, Ballwin, Missouri
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments
...why did you write this?..

Tatiana BRONZE said...
on Jul. 6 2010 at 11:32 am
Tatiana BRONZE, New Market, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We must never, never, never give up" -Winston Churchill

Absolutely fantasic! Your writing is beautiful, and the story is moving.

on Jul. 4 2010 at 10:59 am
ArtemisOwlfeather SILVER, South Pasadena, California
5 articles 1 photo 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I am evil. I am evil. I am evil. I do not bounce. I am evil."

Amazing.

-A. O.


amaranth178 said...
on Jul. 3 2010 at 1:17 pm
amaranth178, Washington, District Of Columbia
0 articles 0 photos 118 comments
I agree, but must add that I absolutely loved your perspective which I'm sure so many can identify with, especially after one has opened one's eyes to this reality that you speak of--it's inspirational :)

BigBird said...
on Jul. 1 2010 at 8:43 pm
BigBird, Brandon, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love is a word not a feel'in unless you make it one but thatz only if you really love that person!!!!!!!!!!!

this was emotional and sad did that really happen if it did i would feel the same as you did when you wrote this

on Jul. 1 2010 at 5:58 pm
bluesky0728 SILVER, Phoenix, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 107 comments
Wow. I know my comment is just one of hundreds, but I am absolutely speechless right now. You have such a gift! You can take a small act of random kindness and transform it into a lifechanging moment of beauty and emotion for hundreds of people! Thank you for sharing! Keep writing, I want to read more from you!

on Jun. 30 2010 at 6:00 pm
cassidyasalways BRONZE, El Paso, Texas
1 article 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the best that you can be, and that will always be good enough"

Wow this was such a hard article to read. It's hard to face the truth like that, I commend you. It's such a shame that the world is so cruel, but I think that you'll get repaid for that good thing you did for thst womsn. And you never know, maybe she did think of that sweater or maybe she didn't. That doesn't matter. What matters is that you showed the world what a decent human being is. You stood up and made a statement and that is deffinately something to be proud of.

BABYLOCKS said...
on Jun. 30 2010 at 9:36 am
YOU PEOPLE DID A GOOD JB SAYING THAT SHE HERES 4 SMILIE FACES FOR YOU!!!! =) =) =) =)

on Jun. 27 2010 at 10:22 pm
Singirlie BRONZE, Highland Park, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
if you leave this earth without having made your mark on it, 50 years after you die no one will know your name.

Wow.really inspiring. Love the realism,yet hate the fact that in many places, this is true.

LivenLove said...
on Jun. 24 2010 at 3:16 pm
LivenLove, Washington, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Words are very powerful, but only if you listen to them."

Wow that was really inspiring, well written too! Even if you didn't touch that girl's life, you definitely  touched your own, mine and a whole bunch of others. 

on Jun. 23 2010 at 8:01 pm
fishnr14 BRONZE, Raymond, Ohio
2 articles 2 photos 1 comment
great job, it really opens the eyes of people who never experienced this

on Jun. 23 2010 at 12:33 am
taintedannex GOLD, Hong Kong, Other
15 articles 5 photos 166 comments

Favorite Quote:
The truth is that at some point, everyone's going to hurt you. You just have to decide who's worth the pain.

Some say having something to lose is what makes you vulnerable. I believe that having something to lose only makes you stronger.

Breathtaking. Captivating.

Phoebe said...
on Jun. 16 2010 at 10:12 pm
CORRECTION: "...I agree with what YOU have done..."

Phoebe said...
on Jun. 16 2010 at 1:41 pm

Nice written with deep emotions. I agree with what I have done to the girl because you felt like helping her at the moment no matter what resulted in her tragedy. You've reminded me of being faithful to our heart is the source of peace. Do what we think is right! Thank you for the inspiration.


on Jun. 16 2010 at 1:37 am
K9_Typical_Islander SILVER, Koror, Other
7 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hours of boredom followed by moments of excitement (and adrenaline)- that's fishing

This narrative piece was not just an eye-opener into the daily lifestyle of a foreign land, but also served as a reminder that there are people out there that help and there are people out there afraid to help. Well worded and connects to our inner souls.

on Jun. 15 2010 at 11:34 am
Linghoon BRONZE, Stem, North Carolina
1 article 2 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
God Grant me the serenety to except the things i cannot change the strength to change the things i can and the wisdome to know the difference.

that was wonderfull. Its true how people will just not care. iv'e seen videos on the news of people being beaten with millions walking by, but no one even tried to stop them. even when she cried.

toflyaway said...
on Jun. 14 2010 at 1:30 am
toflyaway, Melbourne, Other
0 articles 0 photos 85 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You're Bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret, all the best people are" -Alice In Wonderland (2010)

This is breathtaking, I sat staring at my computer screen involved in every single word. Beautifully written, expressing an important message. Thankyou :)

on Jun. 11 2010 at 6:03 pm
Sindy Villatoro BRONZE, Chelsea, Massachusetts
1 article 0 photos 4 comments
OMG! this is realllllllllllly great  it sucks  how ppl dont care about a helpless person who is lying there for help and one person is there for them and you dont get credict 4 that but anyways ur a really great writer i enjoyed it A LOT 

princesspink said...
on Jun. 11 2010 at 2:53 pm
princesspink, Kansas, Kansas
0 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Trying to be poetic never works. That's like trying to be in the mood for potatoes." - Ernest Hemingway

I never thought of this piece as a poem I thought it was a short story. Avery lyrical prose indeed.