Unconscious | Teen Ink

Unconscious MAG

August 26, 2008
By Samaiya SILVER, Medellin, Other
Samaiya SILVER, Medellin, Other
7 articles 0 photos 9 comments

There was a dead girl in front of the library this morning. She was breathing, but she wasn’t alive. Whatever existence she’d had during her few years – I calculated she was around 13 – certainly wasn’t life. She was tossed carelessly on the trash-­littered sidewalk in front of a boarded-up doorway, drugged and utterly unconscious of the world around her. The filth and stench of the city were caked into her skin. She seemed part of the garbage she was ­lying in.

My home in Medellín, Colombia, has a lot of poverty. I’m used to seeing dirty, starving children begging in the streets, unkempt old men sleeping ­under newspapers, and hopeless teen­agers forgetting their pain in glue and needles.

But this … this was different.

The girl’s clothes were pulled high above her chest, ugly testimony to what had been done to her the night before. Person after person walked by. Boys leered. Children gaped and were pulled away by mothers who wrinkled their noses and quickened their pace. Not once did I see a trace of caring.

I knelt down and shook her gently.

She stirred and turned her head to me, and a grimace flashed across her face. I realized she was no child. All concept of age was erased from my mind. Perhaps she was barely a teenager; perhaps she was as old as humanity.

“Señora,” I said softly. A fly alighted on her cracked lips, and I brushed it away. Still she did not wake. I don’t know why I cared. Certainly no one else did. But I couldn’t leave her like that. I couldn’t. I should cover her. I reached out to pull down her shirt but retracted my hand. I had no right to touch her.

I knew what I had to do.

Even as I pulled the sweater over my head, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to give my favorite sweater to someone who would just sell it for drugs. I didn’t want to care. But it was too late. Once you open your eyes and see reality, you can’t close them again that easily. And even though I wished I didn’t care, I did. She was a girl, my sister in ­humanity, a person just like me. God have mercy on us both.

I draped the sweater over her. The pulsating noise of the street suddenly quieted. The outside world ceased to exist, and a deafening ­silence enveloped us. Time slowed. The moment seemed eternal. We were the only ones in the universe – just me, the girl, and the dark blue sweater fluttering down in slow motion.

I had the sensation you get when you pull the sheet over the face of a corpse and say, muerto esta. The last fold of cloth settled on the gray cement, and suddenly time was once again going. I heard the rushing cars at my back, felt the burning sun, and smelled the filth. Nothing had changed.

I got up too quickly, nearly losing my balance. I needed to get away.

“La felicito,” an old man, who had apparently been watching me, said in congratulations. “Is it a little girl? So sad, so sad. What a shame.”

“Yeah … I don’t know,” I mumbled, hurrying away, horribly embarrassed that I’d been seen. Supposedly, when you do a good deed, you get a warm fuzzy feeling inside. But all I felt was a deep, aching sadness.

I used to believe those heart-warming stories about how people’s lives were changed by some small act of kindness. If this were one of those ­inspirational stories, years later we’d meet again. She would have risen from her poverty and pain, achieved success, and been converted to some nice religion. I’d be down about something, perhaps thinking that my life was worth nothing. On an impulse I’d step into a church and – voilà! – she’d be there giving her testimony about how she’d lived a totally empty and meaningless existence until her life had been changed by the act of a caring stranger who had covered her with a sweater.

And then I’d get up, with tears in my eyes, and shout, “I am that stranger!” And we’d hug and become best friends and I’d go home completely happy in the knowledge that my life had been good for something after all.

But this isn’t an inspirational story. The real world isn’t that nice. When the girl came out of her stupor, she probably wouldn’t even notice the sweater or wonder where it had come from. She’d use it to get more drugs. That night she would again sell her body and her soul, and the next day she would once more lie on the street with her shame open to the world. And my feeble act of caring would be worth nothing.

I headed down the street and sud­denly, to my disgust, found tears running down my face. I dashed them away, not knowing whether I was crying for that girl, my favorite sweater, or the fact that no one had cared.

I thought of the Jesus I’d been taught about in church. He would have cared, I think, if he’d been there. But he wasn’t there. I wished he were. It hurt.

People at church would tell me that he was there, that he’d cared through me.

I sighed. Maybe. Maybe.

But all the way home, the pain ­remained.



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This article has 482 comments.


on Sep. 10 2010 at 11:54 pm
kayogirl94 BRONZE, Salinas, California
2 articles 1 photo 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be a man of Right, Never one of Might. Be a leader of the people, Never the tool of authority. Be the friend of the masses, Never the slave of wealth. Be a wise man of good, Never a cunning evil one." -Daisaku Ikeda

I loved this so much! Thank you!

on Sep. 7 2010 at 11:32 pm
splinterstar BRONZE, Arcadia, California
1 article 0 photos 10 comments
You did a wonderful job: For writing this article, being brave enough to call attention toward this issue and being brave enough to do that deed. Not many people would be able to do something like that. ;)

on Sep. 7 2010 at 7:32 pm
speech.write.crazy GOLD, Bailey, Colorado
19 articles 3 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Instead of giving myself reasons why I can't, I give myself reasons why I can. Go for it and don't look back, go for things with your whole heart."

I absolutely love this! It really makes you think about what you're doing with your life. I think it was a great thing that you did though! She might not care, but that man did!

If anyone would please read my stuff and comment on it, I would really appreciate it! Thank you!


on Sep. 7 2010 at 4:20 pm
mskullgirl GOLD, Waban, Massachusetts
14 articles 0 photos 33 comments

Favorite Quote:
All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream -Edgar Allen Poe

this is awsome! Keep writting!

on Sep. 7 2010 at 2:51 pm
inksplatters21 SILVER, Mason, Ohio
6 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Character is how you live when no one is watching."

great story. and it really demonstrates the power of strangers.

would people mind reading some of my stuff?  thanks, it's appreciated.


on Sep. 1 2010 at 4:14 pm
brown.sugar BRONZE, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
i lovin it

this is wonderfully written. it tells the truth about our world today. people just walk by others that need help. sometimes if i walk by a homeless person who asks for money i want so badly to help them but my father told me"people put themselves in that lifestyle. everyone has a choice of how they want to live there life and you are not accountable for there unhelthy lifestyles"

amehndi SILVER said...
on Aug. 31 2010 at 6:03 pm
amehndi SILVER, Plainsboro, New Jersey
7 articles 0 photos 5 comments
Wow, this literally left me breathless. I love how you showed such crude reality and yet I can see such beauty in your story. It's despicable that too many people have become like emotionless robots, and are able to walk past tragedy and pain without feeling a thing. Thanks for letting a little love and hope remain in our world. 

on Aug. 31 2010 at 4:16 pm
JessEEEca BRONZE, LaPorte, Indiana
3 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
•Humor is just another defense against the universe.-- Mel Brooks
•You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.--Robin Williams
•Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.--Albert Einstein

I love this story and it does say a lot about how america and even the world are today in their veiws of people who have lost their way and not been able to get back because no one has been there. They always think someone else will help them but that is hardly ever the case. Any, lovely story!

on Aug. 30 2010 at 1:18 pm
NightStalker PLATINUM, San Diego, California
21 articles 1 photo 33 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I reject your reality and substitute my own!"
-Adam Savage

Hey! It's a good story! If you don't have something nice to say, then bud out.

klove said...
on Aug. 28 2010 at 8:49 pm
klove, Charlotte, North Carolina
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
its sad but its good to know there r some good people in the world

Lucy(: GOLD said...
on Aug. 24 2010 at 2:06 pm
Lucy(: GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
18 articles 0 photos 31 comments

simply unbelieveable.

the message you portrayed was outstanding, and its the truth. the world is a scary cold place, but its people like you that makes the slightest difference


on Aug. 21 2010 at 1:27 am
bookwormchick BRONZE, Wauconda, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Shoot for the moon, if you miss you'll land among the stars." -Unknown

there is not a word in this that does not ring true. simply amazing writing.

there is beauty in the honest truth. you showed that beauty, although it was a terribly ugly beauty.


on Aug. 20 2010 at 9:08 pm
Blue-Eyed BRONZE, Jacksonville, Florida
1 article 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
Wake up with a smile. Live the day to the fullest. And go to bed with a prayer.

Wow! I fell in love with this! It's amazing! I really felt all the pain she was going through! Oh and I want to believe that it has a sorta happy ending! I want to believe she wakes up and tries to start a new life! Thanks for telling the reality and not a fairytale!!!!!! :)

Kassie#1 said...
on Aug. 18 2010 at 5:52 pm
Sooooo sad, but in this world it is true. No one is willing to take the time. Even if the person will be ungratful, even if we know it will hurt to help that person and all they will do is waste that gift. Our example shines through. I loved this article.

_Bell_ said...
on Aug. 17 2010 at 3:48 pm
_Bell_, Ukiah, California
0 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
...

The girl is right when you do a good deed all you could hope for is that the deed will serve well and not be misused... we never will know if it was a lifechangeing deed or if it was taken for granted unless we hear and see it for our own in the future...it is a very sad story but i belive if the girl was like a pice of trash thrown on the street well it was her own fault ... its most likely that the girl had a trobles situation come apon her that she started going in the wrong foot steps but she had a choise since the being everone does and her chosies were to deal with what happen and just try and make the most out of her life get an education ,,, or she could of just gone out and started selling her self to some low lifes and get into drugs and alchohal... what she choose was a wrong path its never to late to start your life over again but in her steps its going to take a lot of painfull and shamefull situations to realize it .. for many people its different some may realize it very fast while others take a long time in doing so .

on Aug. 16 2010 at 1:41 am
LadyInBlack BRONZE, Randallstown, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
We are all the same because we all think that we are different,

Very touching, really draws you in, to the point you feel every emotion that you write. Sadly, situations like this are true in society, but it's people that do things like this, noticed or not, that make a change.

AnnieHay said...
on Aug. 14 2010 at 10:38 pm
AnnieHay, Glendale, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.~Ferris Beuller
The past is the future with the lights on.~Plus 44

i loved this. it took my breath away, thank you soo much for this.

on Aug. 13 2010 at 11:44 pm
DaydreamBeliever GOLD, Lockport, Other
15 articles 4 photos 140 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you live to be one hundred, I want to live to be one hundred minus one day, so that I'll never have to live without you. -Winnie the Pooh

 I really loved this. It was descriptive and beautifully written. The real world isn't great in the way everyone tells us, but there's no point to stop trying to achieve that perfection.

on Aug. 5 2010 at 4:22 pm
Lover_that_Hates DIAMOND, Reynolds, Georgia
76 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"She was fascinated with words. To her words were things of beauty, each like a magical powder or potion that could be combinded with other words to create powerful spells." From: Lighting(By: Dean Koontz)

Perfect: is all I have to say.

Adonis said...
on Aug. 4 2010 at 1:38 pm
Adonis,
0 articles 0 photos 21 comments
Great Story, good job on capturing your point of view.  I think the ending of the story about Jesus, is really true, but also if you think about it; he was doing the exact same thing for people and the world around him also didn't give a **** However, he kept on being good to the poor and helpless.  One persons act can make a differance, some people just choose to ignore it because one person can seem so small against the world