I may seem very confident now but it came with a price.
When i moved to a small island in Alaska (5 1/2 years ago) i kept getting ridiculed over and over again, it seemed like there would never be an end to it.
Constantly feeling bad about myself because people would say" jeez your ugly" or " holy can't you do anything right".But what probably hurt me the most is when they would crush my dream of becoming a musician " Oh you could never do that, your worthless and you sing horribly!". This would wear me down, everyday i would feel weaker inside, but never to the point of suicide( I would never do that no matter how bad),but i just eventually got to the point where i broke down and decided never to sing or play another note again!(And music was my whole life!)
But then this spring i had a life changing experience in Vincente Guerrero, Mexico. I went there to work at the orphanage for 10 days. And you would never believe how much i changed there. My heart grew softer, and all i could think about was other people. But while i was there God brought someone to me who had caught me singing in church(i made an exception for that) who told me i was pretty and had an amazing voice
So when i got back i pressed into God(my greatest decision ever), and decided to change my thought process.
I made myself stronger by thinking of the positive side and not the negative. Now i sing anywhere i can, in the shower, in the streets, in the airport, i will sing anywhere no matter what anyone thinks.
I can actually say I honestly feel stronger, and more confident in myself, and who i am.
I have been told I walk with great confidence and when i speak and sing people feel moved.
I also went to a music camp this summer in Nashville. This camp was called Camp Electric and was the greatest music camp in the world.
But the fact that i got to sing for Jamie Grace made me nervous,excited, and hopeful all at the same time.So i started singing with all my heart, and you know what? Jamie Grace told me I have the most amazing voice and I sing from my heart! this just made my summer.
so i could say 2012 was a pretty great year!
Sorry that this is kind of rambling I just get this way when i share my story.
Keep your head up! Smile! and just be the best you that you can be! You are unique and i love you that way!!