Silent No More MAG

December 22, 2007
By Anonymous

“Is he gay?”
"I think so.”
“Yeah, I'm pretty sure.”
“Ask him.”
“Hey, are you–”

The last period bell cut off the cacophony of fresh gossip. My ears burned with embarrassment, and I walked away as quickly as possible, feeling clunky and awkward. There had always been rumors about my sexual orientation, but the painfully straightforward questions made me cringe. I tried to shrug off the girls' malice as ignorance, but I became preoccupied with thought. My blood rose with anger as I heard their laughter in the background. Inhibitions blinded, I rashly shouted, “Some people are so rude!”

“You f-----t!”

“Wow! I haven't heard that before. You have to be the wittiest people I've encountered.”

This would have been a perfect response if I had said it aloud. In reality, as a shy, easily embarrassed freshman, I had yet to stand up for myself, let alone defend my sexual orientation. I wanted to tell someone what had happened, but I was too embarrassed by the situation. I had experienced gay jokes and “playful” comments before, but the hateful word those girls had used felt like a knife in my chest. A myriad of insecurity, second-guessing, and self-denial ­silenced me.

After weeks of agonizing and hiding the secret, I promised myself that I would never be silenced again. Gradually, I came out to my closest friends, then my sister, and finally my parents. With their support, I grew more comfortable, and I saw changes in my disposition. My face no longer reddened at the mention of homosexuality, and instead of slouching away from intrusive questions, I proudly proclaimed, “Yes, I am gay.”

It is difficult for me to pinpoint the moment of my epiphany, but as I gained confidence, I was finally able to face the ignorance and homophobia in my school. I spoke up with authority, and people began to listen and respect me. They recognized that I was not weak because of my sexual orientation and that I would not degrade myself with silence.

I became a leader in my school, and during sophomore year, I joined the Gay-Straight Alliance. My participation has helped me accept myself and forgive those girls and the others who have hurt me with their ignorance.

Hate is unproductive. I've learned that I cannot hold grudges or become bitter toward people who try to hurt me; their hate comes from misinformation and ignorance. My experiences have helped me to better understand homophobic people and to see the good in many of them.

My trials have been a blessing in disguise. Though I was knocked down, I built myself back up with clear goals and responsibilities. I now have two objectives: to provide a safe community for gay students, and to educate those who harass us.



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This article has 101 comments.


PoojaYuki said...
on Oct. 12 2014 at 1:46 am
PoojaYuki, Kathmandu, Other
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.
-Edgar Allan Poe

I'm bisexual myself and when i first came out (which was last year)..I received a lot of hate; both online and in real life but its better now. I wish I could tell my parents and my cousins but they're all pretty much very narrow-minded and wouldnt accept my orientation.

lourdez said...
on Sep. 26 2014 at 3:57 pm
lourdez, Merced, California
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments
that is right no talking abut others if u dont know the whole story

lourdez said...
on Sep. 26 2014 at 3:56 pm
lourdez, Merced, California
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments
is kind of mean os people gossiping about others race

Zarie2015 said...
on Sep. 23 2014 at 3:30 pm
No matter what people say always keep your head up. Sexuality is no one else's business. You have the right to say nothing when some one is asking you a question

on Sep. 16 2014 at 1:27 pm
Apostolic-Girl SILVER, Athens, Ohio
7 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
...But there are still stars in the dark night sky...

I have to say that I liked your writing. I hate how if people don't like the fact that you gay, they are rude and hateful. Even though I believe that being gay is wrong I still treat people with respect because no one deserves to be treated so cruely. But now homosexualism is so common that not many people say its wrong... because if you say that being gay is wrong, you are hating them. but the truth is that i love all people which is why it's hard for me to say that them being a homosexual is wrong. I hate having to be the different one to "judge" people... I just wan't to help them...

Dimitri.V said...
on Sep. 9 2014 at 11:41 am
Dimitri.V, Moscow, Other
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Live life like it's the end of time"

This story is great, you are a strong person

on Aug. 13 2014 at 3:09 pm
The_Book_Thief GOLD, Brownville, Nebraska
18 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"And when you gaze long enough into the abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you." - Friedrich Nietzsche

I applaud your honesty and courage, and your writing skill.

on Jun. 14 2014 at 7:46 am
Blackjack. GOLD, Suffolk, Virginia
13 articles 0 photos 94 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Take a lesson from "the Greatest Man That Ever Lived," Austin Aries. The ambition and vision of one depends on how bad@ss they look in sunglasses." - Me, 2017

"Who is this Jose, and why is he always being denied?" - Corey Graves, 2016

*starts claping*   Bravo. Bravo. This is great.

on Jun. 3 2014 at 7:17 pm
booklover1234567 SILVER, Augusta, Maine
9 articles 2 photos 8 comments
I love this article! 

on May. 26 2014 at 11:26 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Way to go! My friend had to deal with the same thing when he came out to the public. A lot of people rejected him, and he didn't let that stop him. Now, he's so proud. I can't even tell you how proud he is. But way to go! I love how you wrote this; it's so heartfelt but also straight to the point.

dmax108 BRONZE said...
on May. 6 2014 at 11:11 am
dmax108 BRONZE, Burley, Idaho
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

its good to know others understand  

dmax108 BRONZE said...
on May. 6 2014 at 11:09 am
dmax108 BRONZE, Burley, Idaho
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

hey poster i want to talk to u  

dmax108 BRONZE said...
on May. 5 2014 at 3:39 pm
dmax108 BRONZE, Burley, Idaho
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

can we talk

dmax108 BRONZE said...
on May. 5 2014 at 3:38 pm
dmax108 BRONZE, Burley, Idaho
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

dude ur alot better than me i punch people who make fun of me being  bisexual  and recently i just completely shut down 

perley209 said...
on Apr. 24 2014 at 6:38 pm
perley209, Henderson, Nevada
0 articles 1 photo 54 comments
You go bro! Show all of them the cannot trample all over you!

Jules12321 said...
on Mar. 3 2014 at 12:42 pm
Jules12321, Monticello, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
your writing is great

on Dec. 15 2013 at 8:00 pm
InTheAsylum SILVER, Henrico, Virginia
6 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
Writing with a white crayon on white paper is like loving someone who doesn't like you back....It marks but, always invisible

I can really say that I have observed the same terrible things go on in my school. I was even on your end of it. Making me appreciate this more.  

on Nov. 22 2013 at 3:25 pm
this was a good piece of writing

on Nov. 19 2013 at 10:50 am
I have felt the same way before... All of those rude comments, of hatred and what they think... I have something to say being Gay is not easy... I tell you its not, all of those comments and everything... Its just not right... I love this story :)

on Nov. 8 2013 at 3:18 pm
KSkittles SILVER, Quitman, Mississippi
5 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
Love Is Like Heaven But It Hurts Like Hell

I just wanted to say that I loved your article and I liked how confident you are about who you are. I am also gay and I came out two years ago when I was a freshman. It was difficult but I had my friends and family help me through it. I finally stood up for my self and showed them that I am gay and proud. I stil get the occasional name calling but it eventually died down, and I am greatful for who I am and I thank them for calling me names and putting me through what they did. If they didn't do what they did I would not be who I am today.


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