Time | Teen Ink

Time MAG

November 7, 2007
By Anonymous

Every morning I wake up to the normal sun shooting through the left window, blinding me as I try to open my eyes. My dog, Donald, barks up a storm. He insists that every morning at exactly 7:04, he has to go outside. It really is starting to push my buttons. Can’t that damn dog just take a rest?

After I go outside for exactly 2.5 minutes, I realize I have to deal with my boss in exactly 48.6 minutes. I sit and moan for two minutes. Any more I would be late and any less I would be early: it has to be exactly two minutes. Afterward, I do my normal six-minute shower, three-minute shave, two-minute brush of my teeth – just like the dentist told me – and five minutes to figure out what I am going to wear ­today. That leaves me 4.5 minutes to sit and read The New York Times and moan about having to drive 20 minutes to a job that I can’t stand. Once I arrive, it takes 2.1 minutes to hear the lame story about what Ron, the guy two cubicles down, did last night and four minutes ’til I get to hear my boss complain that I never do anything right.

Spending 9.34 hours at my job, driving 26 minutes home (I hate traffic), taking two minutes to take Donald out and only getting 24.7 minutes to myself before lying down in my hard, cold bed and not falling asleep for another 12.5 minutes can really drive someone crazy. At least that is what my therapist tells me. But in fact it does not make you crazy; it makes everyone else crazy for not wanting to know how much time they actually have.

The thing that will make you crazy is if something goes wrong. Something that has been happening the same way for exactly 12.56 years. When that one thing goes wrong, all hell breaks loose. For instance, if you wake 45.8 minutes late because there is no damn dog barking for you to take him out. Which causes you to be late to work, because you have a 20-minute drive and only 2.4 minutes to get there. Then you ­decide in exactly 24 seconds that you have to call in to work saying you came down with something. But after the phone rings for eight seconds, the secretary tells you that something bad has happened and there will be no work today. You wonder for only one minute what could have happened, but then go and take a shower.

The shower is much longer than the normal six minutes. It takes two more minutes to wonder what is the red goop dripping from your body. Then it takes you two more minutes to realize that you probably just cut yourself shaving.

After 45.8 minutes of watching TV, you wonder where Donald is and what really happened today to call off work. You ponder this for 12 minutes, scratching your chin, noticing the red goop is also under your nails. You find that disgusting, so you walk steps, which takes you three seconds, to go wash your hands, for two minutes, in the bathroom that you never use. You look around for four minutes, noticing there is also red goop all over the walls. You quickly – so fast you can’t count the time – open the shower curtain.

In about seven minutes you realize you have to clean up. But suddenly there is a knock on the front door lasting for about four seconds. But you have to ignore it, you don’t have time, you have to clean up in six minutes. But wait, six minutes is too long. You need 4.5 minutes, but that’s too short. The knocking is getting louder and faster, every three seconds, it just won’t stop. You can’t stop either; you have to clean up, but the knocking ….



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This article has 332 comments.


hi779 said...
on Oct. 3 2011 at 4:37 pm
im from wisconsin

on Sep. 17 2011 at 12:29 pm
Gilbert, BRONZE, Houston, Texas
3 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Impossible is Impossible"

phenomenal...

on Sep. 12 2011 at 9:24 pm
You are correct. I now realize that I was quite blunt in posting such a comment, but I still have to say that there are other ways of portraying feelings and emotions without the use of profanity. Is it my choice if the author uses them or not, no. But just think of it...we have to be very careful of what we say and write (I have to admit that I acted poorly about this in my earlier comment, and for that I deeply apologize) because you have no idea who is watching and who is recording what you say and do. This may sound absolutely absurd and I will understand completely if you stop reading this, but why do you think that employers strive to keep curse words out of their businesses? The employees do have freedom of speech, but they also have to remember that they have to keep a professional attitude at work and in other places. Why do you think that cursing in front of women and children is illegal in some states.  (I am sorry if this sounds curt and ridiculous) A child might be reading the curse words on the screen right now as we speak. I should know what I am talking about. I once was that child who was being introduced to the wrong language. Once agian I apologize for being so mean in my earlier comment. It is just that every single time I hear a curse word, a piece of my horrible childhood pops up again and blows up in my face.

on Sep. 11 2011 at 5:27 pm
to.hold.the.sun SILVER, Maryville, Tennessee
9 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present." -John Green

You, of course, have the freedom to formulate your own opinion and read whatever you wish, and that's completely fine. But don't look down on writers who curse or tell them not to because, when it comes down to it, it's their choice. Not yours. And critizing them for it accomplishes nothing except insulting the writer's ability, which, in this article, I think is fantastic. Also, replying to articles is to offer constructive criticism in their article, not admonishing them for using one word that you don't agree with. 

on Sep. 11 2011 at 5:21 pm
to.hold.the.sun SILVER, Maryville, Tennessee
9 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present." -John Green

I think, as a writer, one has the freedom to use whatever words they want to, cursing or not. That's why we write. Authors pick and choose words to paint pictures, and curse words, while not very polite, are a good and viable way to express anger or annoyance. I don't mean to lecture, but I don't think it's rational to discount an entire work just because it curses.

on Sep. 11 2011 at 12:44 pm
BlueBubbles95 BRONZE, Chambersburg, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 37 comments
awesome, keep writing!

on Sep. 11 2011 at 10:03 am
zadiekatie23 PLATINUM, Rio Rancho, New Mexico
39 articles 4 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

Wow. Very precise as well as abstract towards the end; the mystery draws you onward. I enjoyed reading it!

SirSeba BRONZE said...
on Aug. 23 2011 at 3:39 pm
SirSeba BRONZE, Marysville, California
1 article 9 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Just because you can, doesnt always mean you should" ~ achreon

two words: just amazing! :D

on Aug. 21 2011 at 5:40 pm
singinginthegardn GOLD, Cowell, Massachusetts
16 articles 2 photos 158 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anaïs Nin

Happy to hear!

wishonastar said...
on Aug. 20 2011 at 11:01 pm
wishonastar, Muskego, Wisconsin
0 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

Wow, this good!! Keep writing good stuff!!

on Aug. 20 2011 at 9:52 pm
emilybwrites SILVER, Villa Hills, Kentucky
5 articles 0 photos 112 comments

Favorite Quote:
last night i lay in bed, looking up at the stars and i thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

this was really mysterious...very intriguing! please check out my poems "Forgotten Domain" and "The Others" and comment and rate them :)

on Aug. 20 2011 at 3:57 pm
I thought that this story was both entertaining and eerie. It caught my attention and it stimulated my thoughts. I especially liked the ending, how you didn't exactly say what happened, but you left it to our imaginations--that is the way reading is supposed to be done, with an active imagination. The only thing I would change would be to take out the curse word. But overall, this story was incredible. You are very talented.

. said...
on Aug. 20 2011 at 1:07 pm
It is so sad that some one with your talent has lowered themself to using a curse word as an adjective. I only read the first sentence, and I am very of disapointed about the amount that word  you used scarred your potential. :(

on Aug. 20 2011 at 10:20 am
kagebrubak GOLD, Sidney, Ohio
15 articles 1 photo 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"As you get closer to the light, the greater your shadow becomes."
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby."
"The best way to become boring is to say everything."
"Forget arrogance, just ask and recieve"

That's why I mix it up, everyday I look at the world in a new way. A different angle, to see what I might have missed the day before.

on Aug. 20 2011 at 9:55 am
singinginthegardn GOLD, Cowell, Massachusetts
16 articles 2 photos 158 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anaïs Nin

After a while of following the same old routine, your life may seem like it has no point to it. :)

on Aug. 20 2011 at 9:53 am
singinginthegardn GOLD, Cowell, Massachusetts
16 articles 2 photos 158 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anaïs Nin

*chills* ahh.. *nervously looks around* AGREED.

on Aug. 20 2011 at 9:49 am
singinginthegardn GOLD, Cowell, Massachusetts
16 articles 2 photos 158 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anaïs Nin

OMG! That was so good :) you are an amazing writer..I have a feeling he killed his dog and his boss without thinking..he may have been so crazed or something..wow, so intense and creepy! <3 SPECTACULAR!!

on Aug. 1 2011 at 8:09 pm
__horizon133 PLATINUM, Portage, Michigan
26 articles 0 photos 231 comments

Favorite Quote:
"laugh, and the world laughs with you. laugh hysterically, and for no apparent reason, and they will leave you alone." anonymous

hahaha  i stand corrected!  :)

on Jul. 29 2011 at 4:48 pm
Wearing_Westwood GOLD, Cary, North Carolina
18 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It's self conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can't try to do things. You simply must do things. -Ray Bradbury

** The da Vinci Code

on Jul. 29 2011 at 4:46 pm
Wearing_Westwood GOLD, Cary, North Carolina
18 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It's self conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can't try to do things. You simply must do things. -Ray Bradbury

ARRGGHH!!! need to know what happens next!!!!! please write more!!!!