So... Do You Hate Me Now? Chapter 2

October 25, 2010
By , West Chester, OH
I awoke to a normal morning. At least normal for Abagail. However I still wasnt used to it. Waking up with hair as smooth as silk and a complexion meant for beauty adds. And a text message from Johnny saying I love you and sweet dreams. No one was ever there to say sweet dreams for me when I was in my... my alternate life.
When I get to school, I paint on a smile and wave to the people who think I like them. I kiss Johnny in the corner of the courtyard, making him think I yearn for him to hold me. But the truth is I feel nothing. Trolls dont feel emotion, in their bodies or in others.
Theres an ancient "Trolltale" that Ive passed before. And it says that as soon as you lay eyes on the person who holds the other half of your heart, you can not hold back emotions. You cant lie, you cant stop tears from rolling down your face, you cant help but laugh at a joke whether its funny to the people around you or not. You are overtaken by the emotion you havent been able to feel all your life. And I guess a small part of me wishes that I could feel. That I could feel the desire for Johnny, and I could feel the satisfaction of being "popular", but I cant. So Im living my days just hoping no one notices that I dont care and that Im not Abagail.
I arrived at third period english, with Jenna, Abagail's best friend, at my side. The teacher drones on page after page of grammar. And he calls on me thinking Im not paying attention. I quickly snap my head forward and say the answer in a melodic but harsh tone and he quickly moves on, obviously embarrassed. Jenna passes note after note to me, and its getting physically draining to answer with human perspectives. The bell rings and I walk outside with Johnny patiently waiting. He kisses me, walks me half way to French 1 and moves swiftly to his next class. For a moment I try to take in how much he loves Abagail and how much she loves him, but this has no effect on me. When I turned around someone was inches from my face.
I ask what their problem is in a semi-polite tone, and with a husky voice, and eyes that pierce the soul....Abagail's eyes... and he says "I told you I would find you".

So... Do you hate me now?





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