Music blasted loud, me jumping around my room, singing crazy songs and dancing like no ones watching. Welcome to my days home alone. I sing, dance and dream in my room. I fantasize about things that may never come true. I play with my hair in the mirror, crazy styles that only social suicides’ would wear. Shirt after shirt, I try on; mixing and matching outfits. I come up close to the mirror and inspect every millimeter of my face. Connecting the dots from freckle to freckle and staring deep into the pools of blue I call my eyes. Backing up, I twirl around gleefully. I see the girl in the mirror make silly faces back at me, tongue out, lips to the side, cross-eyed. Snap. Snap. Snap. I catch them all on camera. I step backwards, like a drunken sailor, and fall into the safety of my bed. I drop my camera to the floor and jump, jump high to touch the ceiling. I hop over to my book shelf and snatch up my yearbook. There he is, the boy I’ve wanted for so long. That hair, those eyes, that brilliant smile, I give him a kiss on the cheek and resume my fun. I crank the music up another notch and rock out, completely un- phased by anything else in the world. I find myself by the mirror again, this time I smile, but the girl in the mirror does not smile back, she frowns. I stick my tongue out, but the girl in the mirror snarls. I put my hand up to the mirror and she grabs it.
September 26, 2009