Broken Tears

January 3, 2012
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I knew I wouldn't last much longer. I knew my time was almost up. I was just waiting to die, I guess. I thought I would have had more time; I was too young to die, in my opinion. But that's the funny thing about time, it seems to fly when you're having a fun. A good time... Wasted time...
"Was all of it worth it?" She ask me. She had been stay constantly by my side, never moving that I know of.
"Was it? I hope so. I hope you're happy with the situation you've created, with the life you've made. All the lies and people you've walked all over," she grabbed my hand, "was it worth all the times you lied to me? Was it worth all the tears I cried?"
What was I to say to that? What could I possibly say to make up for a lifetime of sin? I couldn't say anything...
"It's OK... You don't have to say anything...," she told me, calmly and with great love in her eyes. She loved me despite all I've done. I knew I didn't deserve her. I never would be able to deserve her. She was too good to me.
"I'll be here... Till the end... B-because I-I won't leave y-you. I can't leave you. I still love you."
"I'm sorry for all the s*** I've done. I... I never wanted to make you cry. All the drugs, all the alcohol, it can't love me... Not like you do... I chose that over you..." She was crying. Then, I realized, so was I. God, she was so beautiful, even in brOKen tears. I turned my head and loOKed out towards the bright blue sky. The sky didn't seem fitting for the day I died. Life continued to go on while, in a small hospital room, an angel was crying as a worthless excuse for a human lay dying in between the thin white sheets of a hospital bed.
"Won't you accept God's love and salvation, son?" An old preacher from a local church asked me a couple hours later. God was an idea I constantly thought of. My lil' angel constantly asked me the same thing. She would ask me when I was sober enough to understand her. It was often enough. Too often...
"No...," I said to the old man, "God's given me the love of an angel... That's all I need..."
With brOKen tears, my angel stood and ran out of the small hospital room. She loved me too much to see me go.

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