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Romeo and Juliet Balcony Scene: Parody
Romeo: Juliet! I can see your outline up on the balcony, cause I'm creeping down here and it's dark out. I'm just spying a little bit... Just a bit because I just really like to watch you. D*mnnn girl! You look fine tonight! Oh snap.... I think you can hear me. Juliet! Oh Juliet! Can you see me? Please may I come up? I met you tonight at that hoppin party down in the ballroom yonder! And you glared at me... From across the room, scared by my scummy appearance, but doll you really can't judge me since you don't know me yet. I wanna get to know ya but right now I'm just the creeper below yo balcony, pretty thangggg.
Juliet: Excuse me?! Pretty thang?! I'm no pretty thang!
Romeo: Well. I mean. You're not completely ugly or awful... You look a lot better with the lights off.
Romeo: Sorry, I think you are a pretty thangggg, you're wrong, when you say that you aren't. You really do look okay sometimes. When you put on that like red mouth stuff. And wear like those fancy corset thangs.
Juliet: (eyes widening) Romeo oh Romeo.
Romeo: I know you want me.
Juliet: Oh dear god.
Romeo: I see you up there in your nightgown. I'm not sure how yo pops would feel about me creepin down under the balcony, but as long as he doesn't call his mafia pals I think it'll be pretty good in da hood.
Juliet: Romeo. Leave. Now.
Romeo: Jules! I know you don't mean that. I know you want me to spend the night gazing up at you and climbing up the balcony after you go to bed to watch you sleep while I gently stroke your hair. Then I can see if you mention me while you sleep talk!
Juliet: What part of "leave now" do you not understand?
Romeo: Here I come! I'm climbing up the vines to see you shorty! Danggg I've got such swag.
Juliet: No stop! Seriously Romeo! I'll call the police!
Romeo: Here I come sugar lips! I'm climbin in yo windows, snatchin you right up!
Romeo reaches the top of the balcony where Juliet has run into her room. She then comes running out and pushes him off the balcony. Romeo flies backward and down into the bushes. Juliet slams the doors to her balcony.
Romeo: Oh well. I'll try again tomorrow night. Walks off into the darkness.