The Love Chapter (Prologue)

September 20, 2010

It’s been five years now, but I haven’t fulfilled my promise to him. I can’t until
I let go, but I’m not emotionally prepared to do so. I tread along a frosty path,
finding alleviation in the fact that he is still lingering behind me. I gaze helplessly
into the austere winter sky; its desolate color matches the palate of my emotions. The
sun is just beginning to rise in the distance; a pallid beacon of light is erupting from
behind a cluster of threatening clouds in the horizon. In the same way, there is a
faint beacon of light still glimmering inside of me. As I twiddle the withered golden
rose through my frostbitten fingers, tears flood to my weary eyes once again. I am
recollecting his appearance. He wasn’t the most striking character in the eyes of the
world, but to me he was . . . beautiful I suppose, for lack of a better adjective. His
shaggy auburn hair was often tasseled by the gentle winds of our small town. The
Tennessee sun would frequently gleam on his porcelain skin just so it would reflect a
slight luminescent glow. William had little muscle, but the feel of our fingers
interlocking was so potent and seemingly inseparable. His pearly white teeth, which
were being aligned by braces were always sprinkled with rubber bands of cobalt blue,
his favorite color, and lime green, mine. I can almost smell the aroma of his Hollister
cologne wafting up my nose, sending warm sensations down my spine. It’s almost
like I can touch him even though he isn’t really here.

The tears are flowing steadily now.

Although my vision is blurry, I make my way to a lofty oak tree and crouch
beneath it. The winding path I’m on continues to the spot that I still have trouble
facing. I place my trembling fingers on the left pocket and feel the words in the note
that is protruding. I’ve read it over and over again, but its compelling message still
prompts me and stirs the innermost depths of my debilitated soul. I told my friends
and family that I’d be leaving town early in the morning, but only my closest
friends know my actual whereabouts. I run my fingers through my knotty hair not
wanting to remember, but not daring to forget.

Everything runs through my head one more time- Lance, the dream, our first
date, the ten questions, forgiveness, the promises we made to each other, New Year’s
eve, the note, and most painfully- love. Who are we as weak humans to be given such
a powerful gift? I know the answer is simple, but so profound at the same time;
ironically, the human mind can’t comprehend it.

I learned a powerful lesson a few years ago; love triumphs over all weakness,
fear and confusion. I made a promise that I would teach that lesson to someone else,
and I strongly intend to keep it, no matter what adversity it inflicts while I’m here on
earth. Indeed, the promise of love is powerful enough to heal any suffering it causes.
The promise it brings, and the promise I made to him beat prominently inside of me
as church bells echo into the tranquil scene of dawn breaking in the distance.

Join the Discussion

This article has 8 comments. Post your own now!

Eer320 said...
Nov. 29, 2010 at 5:43 pm
It was pretty good!  You had really big vocabulary, and I don't know if that's good or bad.  But I liked your characters.  Nice job!  :D
Shay_D said...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 9:38 pm
You are on the right track! Great beginning! I could definitely feel the overwhelming emotions. But as kao-chanu said, it needs to be simplified a bit. But don't be discouraged! Keep going because I want to keep reading!!!
Shay_D replied...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 9:48 pm
Oh and if you don't mind, I have a story posted on the forums ^.^
gracegirl29 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 9:53 pm
Thanks, and sure!
kao-chanu said...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 7:20 pm

hmm i like the idea, but i found myself uninterested at times. i hate to say it but in the begining you used a bit to much description and i couldnt picture it all. it was good, so ill give it a 4. with some more editing, and a tinsie bit of rethinking, it could be 5 material. good job though!

:) keep writing.

Tehcullen replied...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 11:37 pm

Great job! I like the premise, but I believe there's a tad bit of a glitch in your phrasing. Perhaps you should consider toning down your descriptive language and all the big words-- while descriptive words can be excellent, they feel a bit forced in this piece. Try rewriting in the way you actually speak-- are those words you would use? Your main character/narrator sounds to me like a younger person, and as such, she should use vocabulary that fits her.

Also, you might want to pay a b... (more »)

gracegirl29 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 22, 2010 at 1:31 pm
i agree with what you're saying, however this takes place five years after she last saw her boyfriend, and you learn later in the story that she goes of to college to major in english to be a high school english teacher, and i don't know about you, but my english teacher uses some pretty big words. thanks for your advice on description though:)
unlike-azazual replied...
Sept. 23, 2010 at 6:54 pm
oh my gosh i love it....especially the discription of definantly need to write more....;)
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