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"I Love You"

September 1, 2010
By ClosetPoet28 BRONZE, Staten Island, New York
More by this author
ClosetPoet28 BRONZE, Staten Island, New York
3 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
To me, “fearless” is not the absence of fear. It’s not being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is having fears. Fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. Fearless is falling madly in love again, even though you’ve been hurt before. Fearless is walking into your freshmen year of high school at fifteen. Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again… even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost. It’s fearless to have faith that someday things will change. Fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can’t breathe without them. I think it’s fearless to fall for your best friend, even though he’s in love with someone else. And when someone apologizes to you enough times for things they’ll never stop doing, I think it’s fearless to stop believing them. It’s fearless to say “you’re not sorry”, and walk away. I think loving someone despite what people think is fearless. I think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is fearless. Letting go is fearless. Then, moving on and being alright…That’s fearless too. But no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. You have to believe in love stories and prince charmings and happily ever after. That’s why I write these songs. Because I think love is fearless."

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If you would have asked me last November if I thought that my boyfriend was capable of murder, I would have laughed in your face. If you would have asked me last December if I thought that He would ever hurt me, I would have scoffed at how ridiculous that sounded. If you would have asked me in January if I thought that He loved me, I would have said “yes“. If you asked me again if I thought He loved me in February, I would have said “maybe”.

If you would have asked me in March, I wouldn’t have been able to reply.

On February 14, 2010, I was murdered by the boy I thought I loved.

I can remember when He would kiss me and touch me so gently as if He thought I might break. I would have never thought that He could harm me. I remember the long nights we spent talking about anything that would come to mind.

But most clearly I remember the night of February 14, 2010. I remember every kiss, every touch, every word. I remember Him holding a gun against my head. I remember the sound the trigger made. I remember what He whispered in my ear the last seconds of my life.

His voice was as smooth as velvet as He whispered what He knew I wanted to hear. His breath was hot and fast against my ear. He chuckled as He felt my heart hammering against my ribs, beating for the last few times. And then He whispered so low He thought I couldn’t hear Him, “I love you.”

© Jessica F., Bradford, MA

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This article has 5 comments.

Robsessed PLATINUM said...
on Sep. 7 2010 at 1:17 am
Robsessed PLATINUM, McKinney, Texas
23 articles 1 photo 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I may be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it." - Maya Angelou

"Did you know 'I told you so' has a brother, Jacob?" she asked cutting me off. "His name is 'Shut the hell up.'" - Bella Swan, Breaking Dawn

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I really liked this, especially how you did the whole "in November... in December..." thing. One of the better shorter short stories I've read on here.
deus-ex-machina14 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 6 2010 at 5:32 pm
deus-ex-machina14 BRONZE, Stewartsville, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 439 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There are two main tragedies in life. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." -Oscar Wilde

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Very unique and interesting, but very brief. Add some more to it and it'll be a lot better!
ClosetPoet28 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 5 2010 at 12:12 pm
ClosetPoet28 BRONZE, Staten Island, New York
3 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
To me, “fearless” is not the absence of fear. It’s not being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is having fears. Fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. Fearless is falling madly in love again, even though you’ve been hurt before. Fearless is walking into your freshmen year of high school at fifteen. Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again… even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost. It’s fearless to have faith that someday things will change. Fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can’t breathe without them. I think it’s fearless to fall for your best friend, even though he’s in love with someone else. And when someone apologizes to you enough times for things they’ll never stop doing, I think it’s fearless to stop believing them. It’s fearless to say “you’re not sorry”, and walk away. I think loving someone despite what people think is fearless. I think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is fearless. Letting go is fearless. Then, moving on and being alright…That’s fearless too. But no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. You have to believe in love stories and prince charmings and happily ever after. That’s why I write these songs. Because I think love is fearless."

View profile
Thank you for the positive feedback, and yes I did capitalize He on purpose because the boy has no name. Enjoy the site!
Karli J. said...
on Sep. 5 2010 at 10:24 am
I'm very intrigued. I've just created an account and it seems to me that people can truly write on here. Just one question: Do you capitalize "He" all the time on purpose because it seems to me like you do. Love it! Keep writing!
. said...
on Sep. 3 2010 at 1:18 pm
morbid yet very cute and easily percepted :) keep writing!