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The hard chilling slap astonished him when it came across his face unexpectedly. He never pictured her to do such a thing and she stated in the past that she could never bring herself to do something like that. The fact of the matter was that she just made a hand print on his face. She stamped it with the long fingers that make up her hand. She stared right into his eyes with tears strolling down her face and she was surprised that rain drops were falling from his brownish eyes.
She was so mad and enraged. “Why are you saying this?” She was so confused about his actions and she couldn’t help but cry out, even though she was always worried about other people asking and getting involved with the problems that arose in their relationship that was the last thing she was worried about though.
The question of the matter is still there, why? And why is all that she could think about, why would he do this to her, the one that he loves, or so she thought. “Is there another girl? Answer the question! You owe me that.”
“I don’t owe you anything. And no, there is no other person in my life, you should go.” He said it so calmly that she couldn’t do anything now. Why can’t she be in his life? Why is this so hard for her?
“So what, you love me for so long and you don’t anymore?” She said trying to sound clear for him to hear over her loud sobs. “Say it! You need to say it for it to be true.”
“I do not love you anymore.” The words rolled off his tongue as if he practiced them many times before. Her heart sunk at the sounds of his words entering her brain as she comprehended them. How could this be? She knew he was the one that always did everything in their relationship, but how could it come to this? How did she let it come to this?
“You don’t mean that.”
“Yes I do, and you should go.” The look in his eyes was a like staring into a long dark abyss. There was nothing there, no emotion, no expression, nothing. She couldn’t read him, but he could read her. He noticed the tears still rolling down her face, it was hard to keep himself from crying when he believed what he is doing is right. Doing this now would be a lot easier for her then doing it later. They both thought of why he was doing it and he hoped she wasn’t going to guess the correct answer.
“I know why you are doing this,” she said. “You don’t want me to hurt later on. But this is going to hurt worse now then when you leave. I don’t care what you think is best for me, the best for me is to stay in this relationship with you.” He knew fully well that this was not true. He had to be gone for 6 or 7 years and her waiting around for him was going to be a waste of her time. She has so much more left to do with her life before she could decide to settle down with anyone and deciding on him at this age wouldn’t work, and he knew that. He will graduate in a couple of months and she still has two more years of high school. Then he leaves her here and she has to live the rest of her high school life saying she has a boyfriend when he will never be seen by any of her friends or family.
He was saddened by the thought of not being there for any of her important parties or dances or any of that. He will miss her high school graduation; her junior and senior prom; her next two homecomings; the 4 or so years of her college life. He doesn’t believe that they can be together when he will not be in any of those memories, any of those pictures, nothing. He will just hear the stories that were told about the fun times with everybody, but he just doesn’t want to hear about how great and fun it was, he wants to experience everything with her, but he can’t. They both know this. It was something he didn’t want to go through but if they were to remain together he would just feel so bad for leaving her here while he left and was never there for her.
He must do this, break off this long and everlasting tie between them, but he can’t. See, in his heart, the love that she said she has for him was so strong, but even stronger in his heart. He loved her so much, he always saw the cuteness in her always, but he couldn’t bear to look at her now because he must do this. “It is over between us. We are done. I don’t want you, I don’t need you, I don’t love you.”
As if her heart could not have sunk any more, it did. The thought of having her heart broken by the one she loved, just so happened. How could she hold back the tears; could she even go right now. The words hit her so hard that she couldn’t look at his face anymore. How could she do this, how could she live without him? She couldn’t imagine a day without the boy that made her so happy.
“So what, are we just done now? You loved me for so long, and you just don’t love me anymore? Well fine, I guess I will just go then.” She got up slowly off his bed where they were sitting. She walked over to his desk, picked up all her clothes that were left from previous times together with him, walked up to the door, took one last look at him, and walked out without saying another word.
As soon as he heard the footsteps up to the front door and the front door shut, he turned to his pillow and started to shed the tears that he was holding back throughout the whole argument. He loved her and he just threw that all away. How could he make this better for himself and for her? It would be better for the both of them for this to happen but mostly for her. She needed to know that life would be better without him. If only she could have seen it the same way that he did. How can he make this easier for her? Maybe he would talk to her tomorrow about it. Why was this so hard?
He laid there in his bed and cried, thinking of ways to make things better. He cried himself to sleep and when he awoke, he had a sudden nightmare of something tragic that had occurred. Someone was driving and they ran themselves right into a tree. But who was that someone. He did recognize her? But who was it?
He searched around the room for the one lamp that lit the whole room and when his hand connected it, it turned on with the twist of a switch. He noticed a note there on his desk where the clothes were earlier. He did not recognized the paper or know where it came from. He grabbed the paper and read it:
I love you so much and I can’t live my life without you. You mean so much me. I can’t imagine going through life without someone I care about so much leaving me for so long. I love you. Good luck with the rest of your life.
Your Frosted Flake
When did this get here? How did it get here? All the questions where running through his mind when he looked at his phone and noticed that there were some messages for him. The first one he listened to was from a crying mother, and then he recognized it to be her mother.
“What the hell happened between you and ________ tonight? She killed herself and its all your Fault!! What the F*** Happened?!?! IF I EVER SEE YOU AGAIN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!!!”
As soon as the words hit his ears he fell right back down, staring into space, motionless and just staring. What was there to do now?