Among the Ashes

February 25, 2010
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The wind whipped through her dark hair, blowing it into her face, brushing away the tears that ran down her cheeks. Columns of smoke rose into the night, making the normally ebony sky appear grey and hazy. She stooped among the ashes, sorting through what was left of her life.

Amongst the soot lay smoldering pieces of furniture and mementos. The charred, misshapen bits of keepsakes were strewn on the ground, and she hurled them away from her in a mixture of sadness and anger. Ashes bit at her eyes, causing them to sting even more, bringing on a fresh bout of tears. Memories overwhelmed as she gazed in sullen silence at the ruins around her. This place, this wreckage, was an unwanted image that would haunt her for the rest of her days.

And she would have no one to share the pain with, for she was the only one here now. Someone had been there with her, through the heat and the agony, but the fire had consumed him as it had consumed her home. No one came to help her, because there was no one left. She was fated to walk alone, with only her memories of the past.

She began to trod among the rubble, her feet snapping the burned, brittle scraps of metal. Suddenly, she stopped. Someone stood not ten feet in front of her, bending over the ashes just as she had been. The tears of sadness that had run down her cheeks now became tears of joy. He had made it out after all! A smile broke out on her face, bringing a much needed contrast to the world of black around her.

“John?” Her voice rang out like a bell in the black silence. The figure began to walk toward her, the haze of grey still shadowing his body and face. “John! You survived!” The shroud walked toward her and reached out its hand. Emily slowly reached out hers, waiting for that familiar, tingling spark she always felt when she touched his fingertips. But with another gust of wind the figure disappeared. No one was there. No one had never been there. It was only an illusion, made out of smoke and ashes.

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This article has 14 comments. Post your own now!

Waterlogged said...
Jul. 20, 2011 at 6:38 pm
I'd love to read some of your work :)
Niftygrrl said...
Sept. 3, 2010 at 10:00 am

Wow.This is awesome!It sorta reminded of the hunger games!

Which is a good thing!4stars =]Care to check out mine?

Waterlogged replied...
Jul. 20, 2011 at 6:38 pm
sure! I'll go check it out now :)
_Elsy_ said...
Jun. 20, 2010 at 9:34 pm
very vivid and well writen, i liked it. Can you read some of my stuff as well?
Waterlogged replied...
Jul. 20, 2011 at 6:39 pm
Sure! Ill go check it out now :)
Item-89 said...
May 13, 2010 at 8:14 pm
Really good. It's really poetic, and your writing makes a very good image in the readers head. 5 stars. Please check out my story.
TxDragon said...
Mar. 23, 2010 at 9:21 pm
WOW!!! That was really good. It made me want to read more. You should keep up with the story, you could turn it into something reallly amazing.
Tipz said...
Mar. 13, 2010 at 8:30 pm
hi hello yo wassup
Tipz replied...
Mar. 13, 2010 at 8:33 pm
That's really good, I rated it 5 stars. I wanted to keep reading... write a sequel! The only tip from Tipz is that I would use a little less commas, adding, on, unnecessary details,. Please don't take the tip the wrong way. I really did like your story :)
mambo said...
Mar. 9, 2010 at 7:46 pm
ooooopppssss!!!!! i just accidentally rated it as 1 star and i cant change it sorry! i meant to hit the fifth one!
Mambo said...
Mar. 9, 2010 at 7:44 pm
oh my gosh! that was amazing! i loved it! i cant write anything for my life, so great job! it was really sad though... but it added to the effect or affect... whatever... but it was great. keep writing, you could be an author when you grow up and i would read your books... if u wanted to.
MisplacedTexan14 said...
Mar. 9, 2010 at 10:10 am
Rebecca, this is awesome. I'd love to hear more, and maybe learn more about what happened and who she lost. You're a really good writer. Love Hallie
Dancequeen95 said...
Mar. 9, 2010 at 7:51 am
Amazing! I lovedd it! (:
Waterlogged said...
Mar. 8, 2010 at 9:37 pm
It's my first post on Teen Ink, so please leave honest comments! Thank you!
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