numb nothing nadda

January 20, 2010
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i walked out of the house holding my breath and as i released watched it float away dissapearing and found myself wishing how i could be that breathe. the cold snow quickly turned my warm feet to an icy pink. cold dense air filled my lungs- oh how it matched my heart. it hadn't been yet a minute until my body matched my feet, the only pace warm hlodint in my coldness-my mouth. such words made this wether a hot summer day. even though i wasnt home alon no one made any bit of communicateion in my direction leaving m alone to question my own sanity outside. i knew my body was cold- the color gave it awa and it dint help that i only had on a teeshirt and shorts but my body flet numb, nothing, nada. hypothermia would come before i felt anything. even though i knew i should get inside i didnt move an inch. now the sun was begginign to set but it lacke dlal those vibant colors and the instant high a summer suset has. for once the sunse only made me sad in its lack of performnce and jjust givig into drakness like that. even though it was early i headed on in and went straight ot bed. the electric blanket wa son followed by tons of blnkets, still i felt no heat i as numb feeling nothing nadda. behind my house the brrok still trickled, behind my window hte wind still blew, outside my house the dogs still barked, and beside my bed my sister still snore. today i was sure my world had ended. my living nightmare must have won first place and tomorrow id be dead-although id already felt so already. tears ran down my face without sobs, without blinking, without chin quivers- they'd almost seemed peaceful ye they were filled with such emotion





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